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Array
(
[sid] => 5770
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Pain
[time] => 2002-10-28 12:17:18
[hometext] => this poem is dedicated to my brother ( you know who you are) for helping me start the healing proccess. Its a rocky road but I am making it...thanks for the kick start.
[bodytext] => I hold the knife up to my skin
It almost makes contact Then your words enter my head Your face flashes in my mind I try to shake the images away But they won’t leave I don’t want to disappoint you Or cause you any more pain But I am not ready to release this pain yet I am unsure how I stare at the knife I can see my reflection in the metal I put it down slowly For I can't disappoint you anymore For if I do it I know you will And I can’t have that on my plate I wanna fall down onto the floor I wanna curl into a ball and die But too many people need me I don’t want to die There are just days that I want the pain to leave I promised that I wouldn’t so I won't I need you to realize that I am not as emotionally stable as I look That its all a mask not many people know the real me I want you to know the real me But from the way you act you don’t want to Deep down I think you do You helped in the breaking of my walls Now help me re-build my heart I hold the knife up once again It all starts again [comments] => 4 [counter] => 222 [topic] => 32 [informant] => lil_angel [notes] => [ihome] => 1 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => SadPoetry )
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