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In a Ballroom

Contributed by TheSchroedmeister on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 06:22:11 AM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry



In a Ballroom
Emptiness sits at the bar,
consuming himself,
giving feast to the downtrodden,
an empty calorie waste

While on the corner
three Voids sell
themselves to a lonely
Passerby;
circles for a square puzzle

An artist paints a
stranger with
colors become black,
Cold kills a Shadow;
stabs him in the back

The weak grow hungry,
A violin sobs,
Another soul dissolves,
And god begs a Charlatan
for forgiveness








Copyright © TheSchroedmeister ... [ 2004-07-19 06:22:11]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 06:31:22 AM AEST
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great write, ripe with saddness and left me with an empty melancholy.
You captured a lot here -
"And god begs a Charlatan
for forgiveness"
loved that -


Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 06:41:01 AM AEST
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sad and wonderful write,

pixie xx


Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by Jellybellyprincess on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 08:14:08 AM AEST
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i love the style of this write. very... you know i can't quite describe it. but it's exquisite. yes, that's the word. wow, i'm so inarticulate... anyway, i loved reading this, really. it doesn't spell everything out for the reader which i find fascinating.

excellent.

Ellen


Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 08:45:38 AM AEST
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Whoa... awesome... kinda sad though


Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 03:32:59 PM AEST
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"three Voids sell
themselves to a lonely
Passerby;"

Three lines which ingeminate the feeling of melancholia. Yet I am only concerned with the cryptics, as you have an intriguing mind to me.

I'll keep re-reading anyway . . . 'tis a good work.


Re: In a Ballroom (User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on Monday, 19th July 2004 @ 10:14:28 PM AEST
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Well - you had to know I'd be back after your last!

I, like Neptune, am a fan of the cryptic write. I need something to wrap my mind around - and this certainly offers that. Another intriguing write! Sounds like quite an interesting night out!

Dare I confess how many times I've read this already? nah....
SNM




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