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Array
(
[sid] => 5510
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => My Demon
[time] => 2002-10-23 20:00:00
[hometext] => Pretty much from the start, as some of you may know from my other poetry, one of her concerns is whether i will change or not once we're together. i haven't changed in a year, but the concern is still there, because we aren't together. Way back in December I told her the only way I'll change is by keeping our situation the way it is, meaning eventually my strength will fail and that may affect who I am. Well, lately I feel that starting to happen. The littlest things are upsetting and I've been getting angry quite easily, I don't want her to start thinking this is who I am. Last week we had a fight over something fairly stupid and I pretty much snapped, then I start crying uncontrolably in her arms for about 20 minutes... I really feel I'm starting to "lose it" and that's what this is about.
[bodytext] => My pain, your doubt
The uncertainty The pressure of it all Is eating away at me My inability to prove The loneliness, the tears I’m being consumed By my biggest fears I can feel the true me Slowly slipping away It started before the breakdown I had just the other day We started to argue My head began to spin I could no longer suppress The demon that lies within It gained control of my emotions I couldn’t hear myself think I felt myself falling Standing at sanitys brink I tried to flee To leave the demon behind You were still yelling No peace could I find The slightest things are upsetting me And the demon comes on strong I try to hold it back But can’t fight it very long Then out of nowhere My tears begin to flow I didn’t want you to see it My demons face did show It’s slowly overtaking me I cannot make it go Suffocating the real me My hearts only foe You were so surprised You’ve never seen this side But it wasn’t me you saw It was the demon that hides The demon hides inside me Attempting to stifle my heart I’m afraid with some time He’ll completely tare it apart I’m at peace most the day He comes to me at night Filling my head with fears Too many for me to fight I’m powerless against it The demons starting to win I need your love to help me Defeat my demon within As each night passes by The demons strength multiplies He thrives on this situation And the way my heart cries I need you to save me Before “me” is gone My heart needs your support To push my demon along [comments] => 9 [counter] => 277 [topic] => 13 [informant] => MisterRight [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 33 [ratings] => 9 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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