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Array ( [sid] => 53644 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Whisper (2) [time] => 2004-06-25 10:04:44 [hometext] => i thought i had to edit it coz the previos one lacked the perfection in syllables and rythm so u can chk this one and temme if this is really better or not. :) [bodytext] => When the air smells of love
And the stars grant the shelter
And the heavens bend down
For us to lay upon
And the moon shines brightly
But still does keep it dark
We see a vision divine
Of you and little me
Let me, with husks, whisper,
In the cold wind soughing
And sweet giggling tickles,
With the mild scent around
Darling, whisper to you
My this feeling tonight.
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 184 [topic] => 2 [informant] => frejya [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LovePoetry )

Whisper (2)

Contributed by frejya on Friday, 25th June 2004 @ 10:04:44 AM in AEST
Topic: LovePoetry

When the air smells of love
And the stars grant the shelter
And the heavens bend down
For us to lay upon
And the moon shines brightly
But still does keep it dark
We see a vision divine
Of you and little me
Let me, with husks, whisper,
In the cold wind soughing
And sweet giggling tickles,
With the mild scent around
Darling, whisper to you
My this feeling tonight.

Copyright © frejya ... [ 2004-06-25 10:04:44]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Whisper (2) (User Rating: 1 )
by Hurretje on Friday, 25th June 2004 @ 10:14:14 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This version is certainly very good with a nice, flowing rhythm. A perfect love poem!
Greetz,
Hur

Re: Whisper (2) (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Friday, 25th June 2004 @ 10:46:36 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

awww this is so lovely...........

pixie xx

Re: Whisper (2) (User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on Saturday, 26th June 2004 @ 05:55:20 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Yea..this is very sweet..you can read it twice or thrice in your mind and then decide by your self whether it needs editing or not?..dear girl..here poets usually don't like point out simple things..we enjoy your heart felt thoughts in poetry with a broad mind. venkat

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