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Array
(
[sid] => 53513
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => And I will be okay
[time] => 2004-06-24 13:32:09
[hometext] => I wrote this about a friend, I think a lot of people have been here and can possibly relate
[bodytext] => I’ll hold you at a distance If only to make you see Just how much I find it hard To really show you the real me I wanted you to notice And accept my better traits Tonight I want to admit to you So I can start over, straight I’m sorry that I feel this way I feel like giving in I hope one day you’ll understand That I feel like I’m dying within I wanted you to know How hard it is to be this way To hate my own reflection But to be faced with it everyday I know you truly love me I wish that I could too So that maybe I could be okay And start this over, anew You promised you’d be here for me But I was never here for myself Torturing myself mentally And destroying my own health I know it must be sick to see My arm of precise little scars That’s why I hold you at arms length You can’t see them from afar I want you to understand Why I hurt myself this way Trying so hard to believe in myself And trying to finally be okay There is so much about me I never would want you to know But still I need you to help me So that one day I won’t be so low I know that I am hurting you I want you here to stay I need you so much it scares me One day I’ll finally be okay [comments] => 1 [counter] => 178 [topic] => 55 [informant] => carmen_queasy [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 8 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => dedicatedpoems )
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