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Array
(
[sid] => 39865
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Times Change
[time] => 2004-03-23 02:14:35
[hometext] => Ok, my mind doesnt work in a very cool looking way but I still like writing poetry to let stuff out... I mean, my poems dont even not rhyme.... oh well... Id appreciate some comments...please...
[bodytext] => I was sitting and was thinking
Of all that Ive done wrong
Drank a few beers
Smoked me a bong
Stolen from friends
Stolen from stores
Gotten bad grades
Didnt do chores
Made out with some people
That my friends had liked
Snuck out of the house
In the middle of the night
Cheated on tests
Cheated in games
When I got cought
My friends had my blame
Did all this *****
Never thought I would do
I used to be an innocent child once too.
But times change
Not always for the better
And thats why I sit and write you this letter
I cant take it
The guilt is too great.
I dont know what happened to me
So this must be fate
If you miss me
Damn I feel bad.
Im going to be with my siblings
I love you Mom and Dad.
[comments] => 7
[counter] => 333
[topic] => 36
[informant] => God-Hates-Me
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 25
[ratings] => 5
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => Suicide
)
Times Change
Contributed by
God-Hates-Me
on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 02:14:35 AM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
I was sitting and was thinking
Of all that Ive done wrong
Drank a few beers
Smoked me a bong
Stolen from friends
Stolen from stores
Gotten bad grades
Didnt do chores
Made out with some people
That my friends had liked
Snuck out of the house
In the middle of the night
Cheated on tests
Cheated in games
When I got cought
My friends had my blame
Did all this *****
Never thought I would do
I used to be an innocent child once too.
But times change
Not always for the better
And thats why I sit and write you this letter
I cant take it
The guilt is too great.
I dont know what happened to me
So this must be fate
If you miss me
Damn I feel bad.
Im going to be with my siblings
I love you Mom and Dad.
Copyright ©
God-Hates-Me
... [
2004-03-23 02:14:35]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Avarice_Riot on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 02:21:31 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Poems don't always have to rhyme and they can still sound really good...anyway, this is a very revealing poem. I guess to say that you feel bad is an understatement, huh? I won't pretend that I know what it's like to have done all the things you did, but I do know what massive guilt feels like, when it's too late to change things forever. Your poem reflects that. Take care. |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 03:00:16 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
| such a sad poem and plz dont do any thing silly . all life is worth some thing and all have a part to play in life, and you to have a pat to play so plz plz give life a chance from sircolin |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wrybod on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 03:56:04 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Gwen' The reason your poems don't rhyme is you can't accept the "rules" . You don't wan't to "play the game".
Read my "Trilogy on life" three short poems that could be a signpost.
I think from your last dozen lines you are already well on the way to a better life. Don't dwell too much on the past except to avoid making the same mistakes. Invent a way of snapping out of it when you're brooding.
My oldest Grandaughter has a good one.....she just jumps up and says "That was yesterday!"
bob
PS another good write. If you really want to write poetry that rhymes, I can help you........... |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rhei76 on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 04:02:52 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
| damn gOD, you can write. Your feeling flow great from hand to page. |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 12:54:37 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
First let me say to you, poems do not have to rhyme. Prose is written without rhyme and to me sounds much better than constant rhyming. You did fantastic with the rhyming of this piece though. You may not think you are very good at writing but you definitely do have a talent for it. As far as the guilt you feel, turn and head the other way. You know what you have done wrong, now be brave enough to head in the other direction and start doing right. It will take a big load of self blame off your shoulders and you will start feeling proud of yourself. We all have low points in our lives but we don't have to remain there. Just remember, life is a choice, sad or happy, good or bad, real or fake. Enjoy life sweetie, don't spend it digging yourself a deep hole. Live and be happy.
Wishing you luck,
Rita |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 08:46:14 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
I guess enough people have told you that poetry doesn't have to rhyme. You did a good jobe of rhyming here though. If these really are your innermost feelings, I know lots of people who have been there. Myself included. Keep writing. It is a wonderful way to organize your thoughts, look back at where you've been, and move your journey forward.
Stitch |
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Re: Times Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by STRaNGe_LiNDSeY on
Friday, 26th March 2004 @ 08:44:42 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| good poem. thanks for sharing. |
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