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Array
(
[sid] => 39544
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Regretting You, Forgetting You
[time] => 2004-03-21 00:10:00
[hometext] => First one in a while.
[bodytext] => I picked up this pen today, with the intention of writing you a letter. Man I had absolutely nothing to say. Not a single written word can make this better. Instead I stared at the mark I left on my skin, the mark I did the day you went away. You had only told me where you've been, not where you are going. The pulse within me is slowing. The gash, the scar, the mark, I didn't even think of opening it again, but it was once again open and speaking to me. The pain wasn't a rush anymore. More of a worry that it had taken over. My inside gore wasn't so pleasing. Screaming in my sleep no one can awaken me. The way your smile was so teasing. The way I was breathing with you, blackened by hatred and the dread of wanting you agian. The way life was taunting me in my head. I struggle to think of a nice thing to say. But my mind reminds me how I felt that day, the day you left that message on my phone, the words that severed who I was and left me all alone. The day I whacked my fist into the wall and kissed my life good-bye. I scream in my sleep and no one hears. I live a life no one understands, punishing myself for crying those tears. Hatred consumes my empty heart and I start a new life, full of regrets and full of holes and cuts. The darkness closes in as the garage door shuts. I say good-bye to you and I say good-bye to me. Empty is all I'll ever be. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 189 [topic] => 48 [informant] => Letting_Go [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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