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Array ( [sid] => 38881 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU [time] => 2004-03-16 13:14:40 [hometext] => ABOUT A DRUNK DENTIST WHO LOST HIS LISCENSE JUSTIFIABLY SO I'D SAY [bodytext] => His office opens up at nine,
by ten o'clock their is a line
of patients pained and feeling blue.
But Doctor Mortimer has the flu.

He wheezes in at ten o' five,
scarcley looking half alive.
Extractions, impactions await his veiw.
But Doctor Mortimer has the flu.

This fact has been explained to all,
who walk on in, or place a call.
His secratary pleads his case.
She tries to spare him the disgrace,
and NEVER mentions what is true...
(Doctor Mortimer has had a few!)

He whispers: "Hold them here awhile."
To his patients he turns offering up a smile,
so full of suffering, so devoid of guile.
They're just amazed at how well he's
bearing up, against his viral trial.

Then: "Send the first one." He commands.
As he tries to still his shaking hands.
The patient enters right on cue, and says:
"Hey Doc. I here you have the flu."
"Uhhh, just a touch." The Doc informs.
His insides like a can of worms.
"This time I think that just a cleaning will do.
Excuse me a moment won't you?"
Once behind his office door,
where he feels safe, he begins to pour.
Then doubles his double, just because.
Never reflecting on the things he does,
just to make it through the day.
In seconds the bottle is put away.

Do you know that the flu is gone
when he returns.
He laughs, he jokes, his being yearns,
to make this patient realize, that Doctor Mortimer is authorized,
to work miracles north and south,
INSIDE ANYBODIES MOUTH!

Well. Halfway through this dialogue deep,
Doctor Mortimer began to weep.
I pray the Lord his soul to keep.
With drill in mouth,
he fell asleep. [comments] => 6 [counter] => 270 [topic] => 7 [informant] => rhymeandreason [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 9 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )

DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU

Contributed by rhymeandreason on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 01:14:40 PM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry

His office opens up at nine,
by ten o'clock their is a line
of patients pained and feeling blue.
But Doctor Mortimer has the flu.

He wheezes in at ten o' five,
scarcley looking half alive.
Extractions, impactions await his veiw.
But Doctor Mortimer has the flu.

This fact has been explained to all,
who walk on in, or place a call.
His secratary pleads his case.
She tries to spare him the disgrace,
and NEVER mentions what is true...
(Doctor Mortimer has had a few!)

He whispers: "Hold them here awhile."
To his patients he turns offering up a smile,
so full of suffering, so devoid of guile.
They're just amazed at how well he's
bearing up, against his viral trial.

Then: "Send the first one." He commands.
As he tries to still his shaking hands.
The patient enters right on cue, and says:
"Hey Doc. I here you have the flu."
"Uhhh, just a touch." The Doc informs.
His insides like a can of worms.
"This time I think that just a cleaning will do.
Excuse me a moment won't you?"
Once behind his office door,
where he feels safe, he begins to pour.
Then doubles his double, just because.
Never reflecting on the things he does,
just to make it through the day.
In seconds the bottle is put away.

Do you know that the flu is gone
when he returns.
He laughs, he jokes, his being yearns,
to make this patient realize, that Doctor Mortimer is authorized,
to work miracles north and south,
INSIDE ANYBODIES MOUTH!

Well. Halfway through this dialogue deep,
Doctor Mortimer began to weep.
I pray the Lord his soul to keep.
With drill in mouth,
he fell asleep.

Copyright © rhymeandreason ... [ 2004-03-16 13:14:40]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by Putteragain on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 02:10:58 PM AEST
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things that make you gu HUH!!!

very fun and scary yes scary
michelle

Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 02:11:35 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is really good! Funny! Hope all is well

Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by jaavys on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 03:19:33 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

ah this is so close to the truth. very good job. I'm off to the doctor's?

Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 04:50:55 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Oh dear lord this was not only funny but scary as heck. If I could only clean, drill and put crowns on my own teeth this world would be a better place. It would be just my luck that the dentist would pass out while I was getting a root canal or something. Horrible thought.

Ole Doc Mortimer needs to retire!

Loved this one... Kie

Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 05:27:37 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Must be one of the funniest things i,ve read on YPDC!

wildejohnny

Re: DOCTOR MORTIMER HAS THE FLU (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 16th March 2004 @ 06:37:03 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Your rhymes are really good - and I admire the fact that this is fact. Nothing I admire more than art imitating life.
Well done.

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