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Array
(
[sid] => 37635
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Blades
[time] => 2004-03-06 23:38:37
[hometext] => This one of my older poems in a completely different style from my recent ones. It's about holding emotions in and cutting yourself to release them but then finding that crying is a better way.
[bodytext] => Pressed to my skin Satisfied within Pain on the outside Somehow I never cried Now I'm addicted This wasn't predicted My flawless skin now destroyed I was thinking I could avoid The fate of others Like me with caring mothers I always said I was different How I would have time better spent For so long in darkness I hid Put my heart in a container and closed the lid I used to be normal, now I'm not I've been taken over, a child took my spot I feel so helpless My life is a mess I don't know why And finally I cry I realize it's a relief Unlike my belief To truly cry is an extreme release Of all the pains and griefs The simple hug from a stranger Can be like touching an angel Just to know that someone cares Who smiles and never stares Someone who doesn't judge me To see this makes me feel free I must free myself from this Ignorance isn't always bliss I was ignorant to the consequences Of my actions that became sequences Now my arms tell my life story How stupid I was thinking this was glory The blades were for relief And it worked in my belief Now I see just how terrible it is I've seen my ignorance's influences I must break away Come what may It will be hard to do But I'll start to go to Resources of another sort I'll find another outlet or port I'll start with this container about my heart And slowly open it 'til the world of which again I'll become a part [comments] => 4 [counter] => 234 [topic] => 43 [informant] => desireemiote [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )
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