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Array
(
[sid] => 34967
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Fear.Pain.Hate.
[time] => 2004-02-14 12:32:58
[hometext] => this is not happenig to me,its just my kind of poetry,please comment
[bodytext] => Im really new at this,please comment Fear.Pain.Hate This is my life. I can't escape it. My mom is gone,she died when I was 5.My father is an alcholoic.That's where he is right now,at a bar.It's like a routine, a horrible routine that I can't stop,I wont ever be able to stop it.I'm in my room,trying to do my homework.I hear the car pull into the driveway,I slowly stand up from my desk.I hear the front door open,I crawl into bed.I can hear him coming up the stairs.Fear.he opens the door of my room,I pretend to be asleep,hoping that he will go away. He yanks me out of bed and slaps me across the face.He starts hitting me. Pain.He throws me on the floor and starts kicking me.The pain is blinding,almost unbearable.I can't breathe.I curl up in a ball,something I learned when I was little, He usaully stops when I do this.But it dosen't work today,it only makes him madder.He hits me until all his energy is gone.He slams my door when he is leaving.I stay on the floor,I can't move.This time was worse than all the other times.Hate.I hate him,I hate everyone,I hate the world.Because no one ever makes it stop,on one ever helps.No matter how loud I scream or how hard I cry.Not that I have ever told anyone,I couldnt do that,they probably wouldnt believe me anyway.But I still blame them,they should be able to something is wrong,but they can't.All I have ever known is hate,I just wish all this stop.I just want it to end.I want peace.There has to be somewhere peaceful,I don't know where it could be though.God,help me,he is coming back.I thought he was gone,he never hits me more than once in a night,why is he coming back? God,I'm scared,please,help me.He comes into my room, he screams at me to get off the floor,I try but I can't. He yanks me up by my hair,he is yelling in my face,I can't understand him.Please,just let it end.He hits me in the back of the head with something heavy.I'm falling and no one is there to catch me. I can't feel anything anymore,everything goes black.I'm gone.Peace Blessed peace. [comments] => 3 [counter] => 157 [topic] => 48 [informant] => sapphire2589 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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