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Array
(
[sid] => 30081
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => to die is to be free
[time] => 2003-12-24 01:07:14
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => i'm facing madness and it's not as bad as it seems the cold almost seems inviting it's not what you would think it would be everything becomes what you think all your thoughts become physical emotions become the people or things that you most identify them with they surround you it's kinda nice but in darker moments they don't always look as nice as they did in the light even now inside myself (safe, i think) i can't stop shaking i can't stop crying it's not so much that i'm sad i just held it all in for too long now i can only weep inside and recycle my sorrow even as i feel her kiss my forehead in the real world i can only cry inside and wonder why i can't kiss her back i won't beg for sympathy i chose this path this is what i set myself out to be this is the destiny i designed for myself yet somewhere deeper i don't think that i'll last i'm not as strong as i thought i was i thought that i was unbreakable i guess i just hadn't been tested yet from where i am i can smile and wave and you can smile right back at me but your smile drowns in tears and i see that you still know nothing you can't yet understand i had to die to be free [comments] => 5 [counter] => 261 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Cancer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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