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Hell burns Heaven
Contributed by
Cobalt
on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 10:17:01 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Blackest soul yet
so pure in itself
sins in my heart
don't exist in my soul.
Loved and lost it all.
My dreams show
a truth that dies.
Frozen life can't
save me from the lies.
Too many lonely nights
have been wastin' away.
You'd given me my life
yet never showed me
how to live.
The book of the faulty phoenix.
Copyright ©
Cobalt
... [
2003-12-21 10:17:01]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by LovingWhispers on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 10:38:17 AM AEST
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a Message)
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"Too many lonely nights
have been wastin' away.
You'd given me my life
yet never showed me
how to live."
These words hit right where they should...to the the thought department ;)
Once again my mind is taken for a walk.You are the mysterious one sometimes :)..
Yet I see exactly what you are saying,feeling,thinking.
A deeper one,though short.Nice piece!
LW |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 01:11:15 PM AEST
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Reminds me of the song "Show Me How To Live" by Audioslave
"You gave me life; now show me how to live..."
Good write Jeff... thanks for sharing.
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 01:12:09 PM AEST
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Hello friend,
Good work as it puts one to thinking!
peace, joy, luv, happy holidays,
emy |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rakerman1999 on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 01:53:12 PM AEST
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Well I think it's perfect Jeff. I always have loved the dark writes ;o)
Well done |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by RhymeStein on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 02:03:21 PM AEST
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You wrote a poem with alot of passion. A poem which shows that your searching for something, but then gave up, and settled with a answer that you "made up" to fill in that dark gap in your head which was formed from the question, "How do I live?" . You say "You'd given me my life
yet never showed me
how to live." but actually if you searched, and opened your eyes a little bit more, you would find that every answer of how to live is in the Bible.
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cynthia on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 04:43:49 PM AEST
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Hey, this is good. :o)
It's short, but it's sweet.
Sad really.
*S* Cynthia |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Sunday, 21st December 2003 @ 09:45:14 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I like this I can't say why I just do seems simple, but poignant if u add anything to this plz post it again. Great write.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Monday, 22nd December 2003 @ 04:07:39 AM AEST
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| Good flow...precise but well written.. venkat |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by 13Hopes on
Monday, 22nd December 2003 @ 04:50:52 AM AEST
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This is a very good write, i read it a few times....
Cheers
#13 |
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by jme on
Tuesday, 23rd December 2003 @ 11:05:36 AM AEST
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a Message)
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You have many fans. Now I know why. Well done.
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Re: Hell burns Heaven
(User Rating: 1 )
by carebear on
Monday, 5th January 2004 @ 08:52:41 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Hi
yet another good write:):) I feel what this poem says..
carebear |
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