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Array
(
[sid] => 29804
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Santa's Elves
[time] => 2003-12-20 02:53:00
[hometext] => * A piece of dark humour. The TRUE ending to Santa's Elves lol. I hope you enjoy this I'm quite proud of it myself :) *
[bodytext] => But a nuclear explosion filled the clear night sky
The elves died one by one as their bodies imploded
They fell with not even a whisper or a cry
And Santa Claus with his sleigh so heavily loaded
Fell from the sky with a great HO-HO-HO
And wisemen saw the nuclear star and said 'Lo'
The presents the elves had made with such care
Rocketed downwards coated with nuclear dust
The kids picked them up excited with their fare,
But Christmas this year was a BIG bust
And kids soon began to die from the contagin
And the parents were soon all a ragin'
Rollie the cute little elf he died as well
His little body floated downwards with Claus' hat
And landed in a dell
A little boy found him - his name was Matt,
But from his lips did not emit a joyous shout,
But instead a sad little pout
Soon he had stripped Rollie from his torn costume
Which was covered with nuclear toxin
Sadly foreshadowing his own doom
'Ho-ho' he shouted in the empty streets on a dead run
Trying to dodge the falling black rain
And foaming at the mouth like a birdbrain
[comments] => 13
[counter] => 229
[topic] => 7
[informant] => bobotheclown
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 5
[ratings] => 1
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => HumorPoetry
)
Santa's Elves
Contributed by
bobotheclown
on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 02:53:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
HumorPoetry
|
But a nuclear explosion filled the clear night sky
The elves died one by one as their bodies imploded
They fell with not even a whisper or a cry
And Santa Claus with his sleigh so heavily loaded
Fell from the sky with a great HO-HO-HO
And wisemen saw the nuclear star and said 'Lo'
The presents the elves had made with such care
Rocketed downwards coated with nuclear dust
The kids picked them up excited with their fare,
But Christmas this year was a BIG bust
And kids soon began to die from the contagin
And the parents were soon all a ragin'
Rollie the cute little elf he died as well
His little body floated downwards with Claus' hat
And landed in a dell
A little boy found him - his name was Matt,
But from his lips did not emit a joyous shout,
But instead a sad little pout
Soon he had stripped Rollie from his torn costume
Which was covered with nuclear toxin
Sadly foreshadowing his own doom
'Ho-ho' he shouted in the empty streets on a dead run
Trying to dodge the falling black rain
And foaming at the mouth like a birdbrain
Copyright ©
bobotheclown
... [
2003-12-20 02:53:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 03:26:47 AM AEST
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Cute but ya better hide it from the kiddies
they'll all die from a boken heart.
Very creative!
peace, joy, luv,
emy
Happy holidays |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 09:41:56 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| your a sick puppy joel lol, interesting poem to say the least, merry christmas to you, hugs n' love nessa |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_Kalicharan on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 09:46:15 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Damn, Joel..and I was good all year just for this!!! Oh well...back to being nawtee....lol
Nice and inginative tho....
Hugs and best wishes,
Jenni |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cobalt on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 10:38:19 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Lol Joel. I thought this was funny the first time I read it and I still think it's funny. Durn good write. |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by afraid_of_fear on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 02:07:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| lol, i was having a rough day but this cheered me up! great write x_x_x |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cancer on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 02:52:44 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
thank you. i can't tell you how glad i am to see something like this. all this happy christmas crap floating around like so many lumps of feces. it's sickening. this, however, was hilarious. i've been thinking about writing one about killing santa, but i didn't really wanna listen to all the "what if some kid read this?" crap. in any case, great write. a humor that i can appreciate.
51 |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 04:01:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
mmmmmmm you out did yourself on this one very different never seen anything like it lol
Michelle |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ruby1987 on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 06:38:40 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Woah! Dis Made me 'appy. Stay jolly man, its xmas. Wot if dis 'appened i'd freak out!
Aaliyah Ruby Ellis
P.S Do u still believe in Santa? |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Chanti on
Saturday, 20th December 2003 @ 11:16:00 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
| Haha So glad to see you sharing the Christmas spirit Joel!! Awesome write |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wrybod on
Wednesday, 24th December 2003 @ 02:48:13 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Waaaaaaaaaa booo hoo oooooo
Uuuuuuuuh Waaaaaaaa boooo hoooo
Sniffff Uuuuuuuh Sos sob
Sniff Sniff
Now there there Robert it was only a bad dream...........................look at all your presents
Mummy will just open the window and throw the nasty clown out in the snow,,,,, |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 24th December 2003 @ 04:55:15 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
| Darn it...I guess that means no presents for me from santa this year --sniff-- oh well, my sisters are giving me heaps lol. Anyway Joel, a very interesting, creative and somewhat disturbing poem. I enjoyed it very much. Thankyou for this little piece of holiday humour |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Wednesday, 24th December 2003 @ 05:30:05 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Awesome write...a superb creative thought.. venkat |
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Re: Santa's Elves
(User Rating: 1 )
by Avarice_Riot on
Monday, 29th December 2003 @ 11:22:02 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| You are twistedly brilliant. I was getting tired of the conventional Christmas poems too. |
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