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| Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 29-May 17:10:19 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 28916
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Debauchery
[time] => 2003-12-08 18:33:59
[hometext] => Really long and about last night. Thankfully he called me in the morning. He really was a jerk but, he apologized and wondered as to why he didn't let me in, make me a cup of coffee but, we have a very disfunctional relationship.
[bodytext] => Debauchery Drunken belligerent debauchery In an instant As I drank from the bottle Poison slipping down my throat Grabbing my neck A choke hold a garrote You, as an image as I close my eyes I drink more of the spirit I silently called you but, you did not hear it Thin and thirsty, call me sierra like the desert I laugh at a funny joke. I feel funny My body tingles all over Reality slips into coarse harsh delusion I pretend that you love me You want me to call you Rejection seems foreign concept, no refusing I dial and you don’t answer Message after message This phone is only an extension of this cancer The night passes over us Our demons come out of their closets Everyone’s drama like a wave You were my master all evening Dominating me, I am your thought slave I’m blind to my own patterns of behavior I don’t realize that this discourse is like all others Have I changed so little? Expunge me from your life, take on new lovers! Make me realize so I can move on You won’t and I will stay like this I can’t change, I relish in my obsession Everyday hoping to see you Drunk on dick, choking on your harsh reprisals You have become my reasoning, a million calls That evening I couldn’t give up Sightless from the drink I needed to see you I should have stopped to think It’s typical really, the point of all this It’s typical for drunken people to forget I drive to your house It takes a half hour to get there Where was my head? Why did I dare? At the last minute I started to change my mind This wasn’t fair to you Reality set in for a moment, it was four o’clock But, I was really very intoxicated so I started to knock I heard you get up And you knew it was me You didn’t want to answer but, did anyways You were a jerk and I acted lame I tried to steady myself by pushing on your door I swear I wasn’t trying to barge in I just wanted it to stop moving….The Floor Joking now but, seriously, I’m serious This queer sort of mission set out before me Get to your house, see you, and talk about things What things? I can’t remember now. In my sobriety things aren’t clear Except my longing for you to be near You had contempt in your eyes It was obvious and plain to see My voice emanated what I had been thinking It was all garble and made no sense But, it was said nonetheless You dismissed me and yelled a small bit I think you should have kissed me and expelled your need to fit I knew when I knocked what you would say But, I had come so far and wanted my way I left and hadn’t made it passed your doorstep I felt ridiculous, embarrassed, under your contempt I’m so unbelievably sorry for my typical behavior For my debauchery, for my endeavor I promise it won’t happen again I will practice self control I won’t drink vodka, JD, and Bacardi Gin O.k. that’s a lie But, I promise I will DIE Before I call you Or stop over Before I hurt myself Or worse another [comments] => 1 [counter] => 287 [topic] => 48 [informant] => alisialynn [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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