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Array
(
[sid] => 26065
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Father's Photo
[time] => 2003-10-30 01:40:50
[hometext] => when it seems like no matter what you do, its never good enough for the most important person in your life, and they just cant seem to be proud of anything you do? posted by Neil Struharik.
[bodytext] => this jar is low on oil the flame is burning to its last breath i feel home is not my shelter and it hasnt stopped getting colder yet the dark oustide finds its way in through the bedroom window the light at the end of the tunnel is fading slowly to a dim glow the silence lost its comfort and has became a haunting sound all its own and the one man who can help me is the man who let me go. i dont know why i kept that picture of the boy i used to be the boy that you still loved when you were holding onto me surrounded by calcutta streams and living for the moment i was just your baby and you hadnt watched me grow yet no matter what i did the worst you would do is laugh but your heart is no longer with me and my fingerprints are on the photograph your the greatest man ive ever known the man i owe my life im sorry ive hurt you so much so ill pay you back tonight You'll never have to worry and i can never cause your stress and inside we both can see that this is for the best i hope you know... youre not to blame i chose to end my life and i wish it all had stayed the same but it comes down to this knife the child that you once knew is gone and he couldnt say goodbye we knew this was coming all along we both know i have to die this is all that i can do to pay you for what you gave me ill give up everything for you for how i can love you, yet you forsake me im so sorry father... i promise im not coming back ill always love you im sorry father... i just need someone to hold me like a child who knows its never real when i smile ive lost everything ive ever had but now you have to lose me, dad i want you to know i cared im sorry for my lies im sorry that i wasnt there but i want you to know i tried just tell me about my chances how it will be okay tell me how i dont have it all that bad and ill get through it anyway tell me that you love me and youll miss me when im gone tell me it wasnt all for nothing and youve been happy all along you can stop me if you care before i take the last step help me pick up the broken peices help me find what we have left if not then it must come to this the last promise i will make the last gift i can give you is the hardest thing to take remember me as i once was frozen in that image the blood and tears or yesteryear the trophy of your lineage i give to you this solemn vow ill ease your pain at last but please leave me the picture when they lay me down to rest im sorry father... [comments] => 4 [counter] => 188 [topic] => 48 [informant] => damien123 [notes] => (Edited by Mod_8) [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 20 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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