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Array
(
[sid] => 22895
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => black wall of sound
[time] => 2003-09-07 22:05:00
[hometext] => hearing the voices and screams of the dead. and the heartbreak of hearing your own love scream for you, from beyond the wall of death.
[bodytext] => in the beginning, a whisper in the end, a scream falling apart falling...and yet something is gained when grave voices from beyond beckon us one last time towards the end after her mind broke down her voice was barely a whisper but the things she told me of what is below it all of what she had seen and felt underneath these things were even more painful than her death a drum in the distant woods played a mocking death march as we carried her box to it's hole and in that dreary cemetery i heard them (in her final moments, she must have cursed me with her gift) screams of agony and madness gibbering from those who had lain dormant for longer than they knew a mind-bending cacophony erupted from each grave merging to form a black wall of sound that wilted every flower placed in remembrance that night, alone still not used to the empty bed sleeping on the floor spiders crawled across my face but, i didn't notice my mind was still dwelling on the wall of sound and a nagging question that would not go away shivering against the icy wind i trod to the cemetery hearing the wall long before i could see the graves but, somehow, the wall was quieter now more subdued a hushed reverence had dulled the sound standing at her grave i knew why the wall had quieted clearly through the earth i heard heart-wrenching sobs broken now and again by wails of agony and loss from the surrounding graves i sensed silent tears of sympathy they knew her suffering well the mind waking in the coffin the confusion, the frustration that comes when your body no longer serves your brain the slow descent to madness when you realize that this will never end you will always be conscious you will always Be even as the maggots and beetles devour you you will never cease to exist i lay on her grave for hours weeping with her weeping for her weeping for me my loss, and the now obvious future that lay on the other side of Death when dawn's scarlet kiss bled across the sky i stood, drying my tears and whispered a soft, "goodbye" and as i reached the cemetery gates she screamed out my name (the sorrow that was expressed in that solitary screech has haunted my ever waking moment) i stopped and turned as if to run to her, to comfort her but i knew that, now, i could do nothing for her my presence would only make the separation more unbearable so with fresh tears staining my face i did the hardest thing i've ever had to do i blew a soft kiss into the wind, hoping it would reach her and i turned and walked away chased by the ceaseless screaming of my name [comments] => 9 [counter] => 181 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Cancer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 15 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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