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Array
(
[sid] => 22574
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Too cruel betrayal
[time] => 2003-09-01 05:05:00
[hometext] => I got warning, my heart told me about troubles, just a week before i left for holidays,my fault I was not careful , was lazy to change plans.. this is the price I paid for that.. Just only another life experience.....
[bodytext] => I thought he was real friend I trusted him, he really cared he was so nice but he was too jealous, god! Accommodated in his family caravan all evenings alone, he said: you can invite some of your friends I did But when he saw me with him he changed his eyes were strange "I am jealous girl" I could read in them well In his house I used his pc to talk to my friends I was gonna visit then I logged off , left to caravan and lied in bed - it was the night Suddenly mobile beeped I got sms asking: "are you at pc?" Another friend sent me that and I replied:"nope, I am sleeping, it is the night". He wrote again: "you are logged on, that is strange" I got scared, sat on bed took my phone and called: "what are you saying? what is wrong?" "There is someone pretending you, asking strange questions and I knew something was not ok, so wanted to let you know" I could not breath, started to cry when again beeped mobile , another sms , another friend the same story - will not it end???? Another call another explanation scary messages crying me I wished this was dream.... Let me call him Friend X that man who talked to my friends 4 of them - who let me know maybe more?? Friend X sent me also sms rude, cheeky , unpolite asking me so private, intimate questions like: "Did you sleep with man Y, and do not invite that your friend all he wants from you is sex"..... So hard to explain what I felt I thought my world has burned I felt like in dream with nightmare I felt I was in dark hole with no light I felt lost and betrayed I felt like Iwas dead... Heart was bleeding confussion in me what to do now??? stay - or run away?? Exhausted, in the early morn I fell asleep woke up so early Friend X came lied in my eyes and said: "when I came to pc, I saw a message which scared me and I talked to only one of your friends", and then he added sentence: "If you sleep with friend "O", then you are a whore". Friend O was that one, I was planning to invite for a supper and night walk I did not want to be alone, .... It was like he took long knife and thrust it in my heart Oh god, why should I???? This all was: behind the borders of my understanding the worst I have ever experienced typical case of pretty jealous friend Well, let me write the end: I forgave this X friend, why not? This case made another scar in my heart which again remainded me that: THE ONLY ONE YOU CAN TRUST IS ALWAYS ONLY YOUR OWN HEART. He had absolutely no right to reply to my friends, no reason to think I was a whore. I accepted his opinion, cos I still know, who I am and who I was.. that is all.................. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 173 [topic] => 21 [informant] => Aika [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )
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