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Array
(
[sid] => 21551
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Depression On A Silver Platter
[time] => 2003-08-06 22:35:00
[hometext] => I wrote this with a million things running through my head a while back. I just found it in my documents and decided to share it. At the time, I had just had a n argument with my mother and her best friend. They were saying that I got everything handed to me on a silver platter and that I needed to get out there and take initiatives to get things done for myself. But after much thought I realized the other thing life handed me on a silver platter... was depression...
[bodytext] => I’ll have my cake and eat it, too.
Hand it to me on a silver platter.
I skate right by; I get a free ride,
Life is no struggling matter.
Or so they think…
I’m 18 years old, but I’m old for my age.
Maturity was dropped in my lap too soon.
I became an adult before my time,
Responsibilities since I left the womb.
Mommy’s little helper, Mommy’s little Crutch,
Relied on and depended upon.
Never meeting expectations, but trying still,
Even after Daddy was gone…
But things were hard for me too…
I learned to hate my education and my appetite.
I became irresponsible and disrespectful.
With no one to be my crutch, I took on a downward spiral.
The only real friends I had became hateful.
I’m a born successful failure.
I’m a high school drop out and a full time waitress.
I am not living the dream I dreamed.
I’m that of a damsel in distress.
Depression has me sleeping 12 hours a day.
I rarely ever eat or go out with friends.
I have become obsessed with my appearance,
Spending over 200 dollars I didn’t have to spend.
Why did I then???
Car-less and love-less, from friends and family alike.
I have nowhere else to turn but to my co-workers,
And to the man in my life who won’t title our relationship.
I assume it’s the commitment... Makes me feel worthless.
Everyone I know and love has turned on me,
Rather than reached out a hand.
First my step dad, then my family, and my closest friends.
I can’t wait to see who’s next, who doesn’t understand…
And never will…
The cake wasn’t handed to me, I stole it.
The platter wasn’t silver, but aluminum.
My skates are broken, and I pay for the ride everyday.
If I could change things, I would, Just gimme’ an alternatum…
Or can you…?
[comments] => 8
[counter] => 232
[topic] => 32
[informant] => Crys
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 5
[ratings] => 1
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => SadPoetry
)
Depression On A Silver Platter
Contributed by
Crys
on
Wednesday, 6th August 2003 @ 10:35:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I’ll have my cake and eat it, too.
Hand it to me on a silver platter.
I skate right by; I get a free ride,
Life is no struggling matter.
Or so they think…
I’m 18 years old, but I’m old for my age.
Maturity was dropped in my lap too soon.
I became an adult before my time,
Responsibilities since I left the womb.
Mommy’s little helper, Mommy’s little Crutch,
Relied on and depended upon.
Never meeting expectations, but trying still,
Even after Daddy was gone…
But things were hard for me too…
I learned to hate my education and my appetite.
I became irresponsible and disrespectful.
With no one to be my crutch, I took on a downward spiral.
The only real friends I had became hateful.
I’m a born successful failure.
I’m a high school drop out and a full time waitress.
I am not living the dream I dreamed.
I’m that of a damsel in distress.
Depression has me sleeping 12 hours a day.
I rarely ever eat or go out with friends.
I have become obsessed with my appearance,
Spending over 200 dollars I didn’t have to spend.
Why did I then???
Car-less and love-less, from friends and family alike.
I have nowhere else to turn but to my co-workers,
And to the man in my life who won’t title our relationship.
I assume it’s the commitment... Makes me feel worthless.
Everyone I know and love has turned on me,
Rather than reached out a hand.
First my step dad, then my family, and my closest friends.
I can’t wait to see who’s next, who doesn’t understand…
And never will…
The cake wasn’t handed to me, I stole it.
The platter wasn’t silver, but aluminum.
My skates are broken, and I pay for the ride everyday.
If I could change things, I would, Just gimme’ an alternatum…
Or can you…?
Copyright ©
Crys
... [
2003-08-06 22:35:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by sicknivesevered on
Wednesday, 6th August 2003 @ 10:39:58 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| nice view on teen angst |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Crys on
Thursday, 7th August 2003 @ 04:04:38 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I'm not quite sure whether or not I should be insulted by this comment, but I thank you for leaving it anyhow. I put alot of feeling into this when it was written, I was deep in emotion and depression at the time. Anxiety? Hardly...Apprehensive, perhaps... But insecure? A deffinate, I admit. Teen angst... Seems like a thing people take likely when you put it that way. Something sort of typically expected. I hardly think so. My life has, as of late, been a living hell. If you only knew.... |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by jaeann on
Thursday, 7th August 2003 @ 02:59:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| yes indeed!!! good write.....and you need a relationship with a title...........you are worth it!! |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Crys on
Thursday, 7th August 2003 @ 07:02:14 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| I do now have a relationship that is titled. The guy I'm dating is a one of a kind. Respects me, tends to my wants and needs, and loves me unconditionally. I thank you for your comment. I'm glad you enjoyed it. |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Thursday, 7th August 2003 @ 09:06:13 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
This was so sad. I know what its like to feel like ***** and my heart aches for you... I wish you didn't feel this way and I hope writing is a release for you like it is for me. Don't let the ppl who can't or won't understand get you down. Great poem and I loved the title. Hang in there...
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Crys on
Friday, 8th August 2003 @ 07:02:58 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Some times it seems as if writing is my only escape. I love to write and even sing. It's a great stress reliever. It's hard not to let the people who don't understand get me down, because they're people I love and need. But they refuse to help me, making me feel worthless. So many people have turned their backs on me, it's rediculous.
I'm glad you liked the title, I thought it was only appropriate, you know? Fit perfectly, besides, the silver Platter thing was part of a line.. Depression.. Platter... it all clicked, lol...I'm glad you liked it, Thanks for commenting. And Yes, I'm still hanging on. Thanks for the support.
*~*Crys*~* |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Saira on
Tuesday, 19th August 2003 @ 08:22:41 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is a very hertfelt and beautiful write, Cry. You poured out your feelings quite well. I loved the title...it's good. You know what I call to my depression? "An alluring depression" =o)
Very good work. Loved it!
Stay well!
Saira |
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Re: Depression On A Silver Platter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Trisha on
Monday, 8th September 2003 @ 02:50:14 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I can stay you really need a friend on your side. I could say I am spoiled. My mom gives me everything I want. I mean some times I tell her not to give it to me cause I understand you can't get everything you want. I could say that I had friends but they turned on me when stuff got hard. |
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