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Array ( [sid] => 19550 [catid] => 1 [aid] => Mick [title] => In The Dark [time] => 2003-06-25 08:45:00 [hometext] => (This one is probably one of my most honest poems yet). [bodytext] => I never believed there was an emotion as powerful
as love.
Then you came one day, and showed me you
loved me.
I loved you as well once I let myself fall.
You led me into a life of illuminence.
In that light I trusted, I cared, I held hope, comfort, I
loved.

You spun your web of spidersilk so perfectly with
my heart becoming wrapped so tightly.
The more you "love" me, the tighter you wrap my
heart, causing its fluttery beat to slow.

I dreamt of so many things we'd share and
experience together.
Once we could be together we could take on the
world and all of its horrors.
Little did I know I fell in love with betrayal.

I sacrificed so much for you and only you.

My love.
My first love.

I even sacrificed myself in hopes that the words
you spoke were for my heart, and my heart alone.

Spinning your web, you knew my heart was still
weak from bring broken not long before.
You wrap tighter, slowing the beating of my heart
until finally the beating ceases.

You are left alone, waiting for your next victim
while I plunge into the murky depths of woe.

I loved you.
You "loved" me.

We were supposed to always be together.
Instead I am left in the dark.

Alone.
Broken.

Surprisingly, comforted knowing the dark
will remain the place for me. Alone in the dark,
where I belong.
[comments] => 5 [counter] => 189 [topic] => 32 [informant] => punkwthn [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => SadPoetry )

In The Dark

Contributed by punkwthn on Wednesday, 25th June 2003 @ 08:45:00 AM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry

I never believed there was an emotion as powerful
as love.
Then you came one day, and showed me you
loved me.
I loved you as well once I let myself fall.
You led me into a life of illuminence.
In that light I trusted, I cared, I held hope, comfort, I
loved.

You spun your web of spidersilk so perfectly with
my heart becoming wrapped so tightly.
The more you "love" me, the tighter you wrap my
heart, causing its fluttery beat to slow.

I dreamt of so many things we'd share and
experience together.
Once we could be together we could take on the
world and all of its horrors.
Little did I know I fell in love with betrayal.

I sacrificed so much for you and only you.

My love.
My first love.

I even sacrificed myself in hopes that the words
you spoke were for my heart, and my heart alone.

Spinning your web, you knew my heart was still
weak from bring broken not long before.
You wrap tighter, slowing the beating of my heart
until finally the beating ceases.

You are left alone, waiting for your next victim
while I plunge into the murky depths of woe.

I loved you.
You "loved" me.

We were supposed to always be together.
Instead I am left in the dark.

Alone.
Broken.

Surprisingly, comforted knowing the dark
will remain the place for me. Alone in the dark,
where I belong.

Copyright © punkwthn ... [ 2003-06-25 08:45:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: In The Dark (User Rating: 1 )
by UnleashedFuture on Wednesday, 25th June 2003 @ 08:53:42 AM AEST
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I love it! But through the heartbreak you will carry something on to the next relationship from this one.

Re: In The Dark (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 25th June 2003 @ 10:05:07 AM AEST
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WOW, very powerful poem. Really touched me, I know your pain. Keep your chin up and your eyes open.

Re: In The Dark (User Rating: 1 )
by Ilhar on Wednesday, 25th June 2003 @ 10:08:39 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Although in the dark for a while
A light will come and make you smile
For love has a way of sneaking through
Even the thickest wall built by you

Shari

Re: In The Dark (User Rating: 1 )
by ForsakenSoul on Sunday, 29th June 2003 @ 05:35:41 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I could name so many quotes that could say "tis better to have loved and lost..." or "One must first know pain to know bliss" But that would not help comfort the pain any. If it helps, you show no sign of the scars within.
As far as the poetry, good use of detail, and great job with emphasizing the small words and phrases with line breaks. The only thing I would suggest was try to create a better rhythm.

Re: In The Dark (User Rating: 1 )
by Jilly on Wednesday, 9th July 2003 @ 03:17:07 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

beautiful write... beautiful heart...
~Jilly

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