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Array ( [sid] => 19479 [catid] => 1 [aid] => Mick [title] => Red Lightning [time] => 2003-06-23 14:45:00 [hometext] => I must apologise for this poem. It is terrible, I know but I don't have anything else at the moment.... not that i can find anyhow. [bodytext] => Brown stains on the duvet show what happened.
The smell of rancid iron fills the air
Like a crowd of fury.
The silence is suffocating,
So intense that heartbeats echo off Bastille walls.
Two eyes on the outside watch from the middle.
And the sound of breathing impregnates the air.
The arm is destroyed,
Slashed by red lightning
That strikes the same place too many times.
The figure still observes.
White fingers creep over the scars
Touching reality.
The eyes squeeze shut.
A swift movement.
The body sinks
Reality stains the duvet.
There is nothing left

[comments] => 5 [counter] => 267 [topic] => 36 [informant] => aboutdesouffle [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )

Red Lightning

Contributed by aboutdesouffle on Monday, 23rd June 2003 @ 02:45:00 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide

Brown stains on the duvet show what happened.
The smell of rancid iron fills the air
Like a crowd of fury.
The silence is suffocating,
So intense that heartbeats echo off Bastille walls.
Two eyes on the outside watch from the middle.
And the sound of breathing impregnates the air.
The arm is destroyed,
Slashed by red lightning
That strikes the same place too many times.
The figure still observes.
White fingers creep over the scars
Touching reality.
The eyes squeeze shut.
A swift movement.
The body sinks
Reality stains the duvet.
There is nothing left

Copyright © aboutdesouffle ... [ 2003-06-23 14:45:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Red Lightning (User Rating: 1 )
by AngryBunny on Monday, 23rd June 2003 @ 04:04:11 PM AEST
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That was immensely powerful. I adored the imagery you created.

Re: Red Lightning (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_Kalicharan on Monday, 23rd June 2003 @ 04:39:45 PM AEST
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You have nothing to apologise for... great imagery....
Jenni

Re: Red Lightning (User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on Monday, 23rd June 2003 @ 09:17:11 PM AEST
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I agree you have nothing to apologize for...
Good write

Re: Red Lightning (User Rating: 1 )
by tease_whizz on Tuesday, 24th June 2003 @ 03:23:23 PM AEST
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dark imagery and an interesting way of depicting self harm. the images created are powerful and visually striking. great write, welcome to YPDC, hope to read more from you soon, Kate x

Re: Red Lightning (User Rating: 1 )
by wild_heart_of_fire on Wednesday, 25th June 2003 @ 03:05:20 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

awsome write......wonderful imagery...you have an amazing talent. i hope to read more of yours in the future. keep writing! may all your days be bright and sunny from now unil forever ends!
Always,
~*riki lynn*~

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