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Array ( [sid] => 185518 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Restless Shadow [time] => 2018-10-11 16:01:12 [hometext] => [bodytext] => I am a restless shadow
on a wall of sorrow
mumble when I speak
does not matter no listens or cares
focus on a feeling
so many things I have been concealing
it is so hard to breathe
when fear is in the air

during the intervention
my visions were never mentioned
I am off balanced and I know it
all poets live in pain
thinking about
the apocalypse
come home smelling like whiskey
when I am suppose to be at AA

All my friends lie
never saying what they are thinking
so much agony and misery
it is hard to ignore and endure
they will say that they never knew
I was so unsatisfied
when they find me in a deep sleep
on my bedroom floor

[comments] => 4 [counter] => 72 [topic] => 21 [informant] => unknown_utopia [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )

Restless Shadow

Contributed by unknown_utopia on Thursday, 11th October 2018 @ 04:01:12 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems

I am a restless shadow
on a wall of sorrow
mumble when I speak
does not matter no listens or cares
focus on a feeling
so many things I have been concealing
it is so hard to breathe
when fear is in the air

during the intervention
my visions were never mentioned
I am off balanced and I know it
all poets live in pain
thinking about
the apocalypse
come home smelling like whiskey
when I am suppose to be at AA

All my friends lie
never saying what they are thinking
so much agony and misery
it is hard to ignore and endure
they will say that they never knew
I was so unsatisfied
when they find me in a deep sleep
on my bedroom floor

Copyright © unknown_utopia ... [ 2018-10-11 16:01:12]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Restless Shadow (User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on Thursday, 11th October 2018 @ 09:11:10 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I know EXACTLY where you are or where you/'/re coming from. I drank to drown from 13 to 52. I/'/m 54 and coming up on 3 years sober.

I/'/m here to say that you can beat it. my life has changed so much since I quit, it/'/s just ridiculous.

Your poem took me back to that dark place, and that/'/s a good thing. 1. You met your objective, which is to make us feel what you feel. 2. In doing so, you provided a vivid reminder of why I don/'/t plan on ever going back there.

Very well done. If you EVER need a stranger you never have to meet, that cares alot about you (I DO), and is also a /'/poet that lives in pain/'/, then I/'/m your guy!

Invierno

Re: Restless Shadow (User Rating: 1 )
by softerware on Friday, 12th October 2018 @ 03:48:15 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Most of us have addictions; food, booze, sex; shoplifting--were none of us perfect.
Habits give us temporary relief and therein lies the attraction.
Every third face that you see can relate to your poem. While friends can support us, a professional can give us tools to take with us. We may not like them, but they sure can help us battle our demons.
Your poem paints pictures. Trust me, you are not alone.
softerware

Re: Restless Shadow (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Saturday, 13th October 2018 @ 08:18:35 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I don/'/t know,
they never say,
the way the world
goes,
sullen, wishing for some
clarity, everyone requires
reassurances,
have a nice day,
the way my own eyes
look back to me
after a sleepless night
I rub the mirror as if it
had become fogged
I check the lighting
In my mind there is this
empty vacant parking
lot, finally...
and I park far far away
who is that person staring
straight in the mirror
back at somebody else
looking past myself
I think

what the heck is wrong
with me
am I some kind of ghost
am I already dead

and then, strangely
these arms come from behind
and shave my face with
a straight razor
which of course
allows me to finally
appreciate
exactly what I always
expected
was far better than
mail order razors

I might be crazy
but I ain/'/t dumb

Peace!

Re: Restless Shadow (User Rating: 1 )
by allforyou on Wednesday, 7th November 2018 @ 07:38:08 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

"so many things I have been concealing
it is so hard to breathe
when fear is in the air"

^that is one of the best things I/'/ve read recently. just..wow.

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