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Array
(
[sid] => 181631
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Shattered me
[time] => 2015-08-21 21:05:31
[hometext] => Aug 7 2015 my world stopped there were two seperate incidents that happened on that frid that forever will wreck me
[bodytext] => I sat in my chair,body bruised and hurt
the days events had me in shambles
a walking zombie in shock.
The sun went down
and turned the earth dark
late at night,upon the door came a knock.
My heart sank,do not open the door
nobody comes this late.
Three officers stood with sullen faces
and came inside and asked,"how are you?
Weak voiced I said ok,but I wasn't.
An officer knelt infront of me
down on both knees.
My heart began to beat
what he said I could hardly believe.
We have located the car,
inside we found Gary
mam he was deceased
and had been forawhile there.
First my mind screamed
my hands covered my mouth.
I wanted to scream wanted to shout
but it was caught in my throat
caught in my soul
my head began to spin
I wanted to let go but could not.
Then the wave came
and the tears opened lose
I screamed,"where is God now"
when Id needed him most.
The cross necklace that hung
beautiful around my tanned neck
was ripped from my body
and tossed in the air
and at that moment I didn't care.
For over a month I fretted and worried.
I ranted and raved then cried rivers of tears.
Then I knew what had haunted my heart
he was dead and gone
never to return to me once more.
Now my world is twisted and ugly.
My heart beats in half
my moments are lonely.
More questions than answers
more mysteries everyday.
He is just gone, each night and each day.
His last words to me were haunting
and he was angry with me.
Over something he had done
but wouldn't accept responsibility.
I never got to say goodbye
there wont be a funeral or fairwell.
His tomb was inside our car
died alone in the back of a truckstop.
I am haunted and sad broken in two
mountains reaching for miles
no hope in my view.
Poof and its over
and it has shattered me.
[comments] => 10
[counter] => 449
[topic] => 39
[informant] => shelby
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 0
[ratings] => 0
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => Grief
)
Shattered me
Contributed by
shelby
on
Friday, 21st August 2015 @ 09:05:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
I sat in my chair,body bruised and hurt
the days events had me in shambles
a walking zombie in shock.
The sun went down
and turned the earth dark
late at night,upon the door came a knock.
My heart sank,do not open the door
nobody comes this late.
Three officers stood with sullen faces
and came inside and asked,"how are you?
Weak voiced I said ok,but I wasn't.
An officer knelt infront of me
down on both knees.
My heart began to beat
what he said I could hardly believe.
We have located the car,
inside we found Gary
mam he was deceased
and had been forawhile there.
First my mind screamed
my hands covered my mouth.
I wanted to scream wanted to shout
but it was caught in my throat
caught in my soul
my head began to spin
I wanted to let go but could not.
Then the wave came
and the tears opened lose
I screamed,"where is God now"
when Id needed him most.
The cross necklace that hung
beautiful around my tanned neck
was ripped from my body
and tossed in the air
and at that moment I didn't care.
For over a month I fretted and worried.
I ranted and raved then cried rivers of tears.
Then I knew what had haunted my heart
he was dead and gone
never to return to me once more.
Now my world is twisted and ugly.
My heart beats in half
my moments are lonely.
More questions than answers
more mysteries everyday.
He is just gone, each night and each day.
His last words to me were haunting
and he was angry with me.
Over something he had done
but wouldn't accept responsibility.
I never got to say goodbye
there wont be a funeral or fairwell.
His tomb was inside our car
died alone in the back of a truckstop.
I am haunted and sad broken in two
mountains reaching for miles
no hope in my view.
Poof and its over
and it has shattered me.
Copyright ©
shelby
... [
2015-08-21 21:05:31]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 21st August 2015 @ 09:31:04 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| OMG, Michelle!!! I had no idea. I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry!!!! :( :( :( :( :( |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Saturday, 22nd August 2015 @ 12:40:46 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I like these lines in your poem:
"Now my world is twisted and ugly.
My heart beats in half
my moments are lonely.
More questions than answers
more mysteries everyday.
He is just gone, each night and each day"
And I think of these from the movie "Joseph"
"You know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
I'll take what answers you supply
Cause you know better than I"
As a 4 time attemptee of suicide I can relate to your tragedy and sorrow. The pain of losing loved ones can make us question the creator. |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by The_Unknown on
Saturday, 22nd August 2015 @ 12:59:57 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I am truly sorry for your loss.
This is one thing that I adore about poetry - being able to write freely attempting to capture an emotion that you can't sum up in a word
or being able to tell a story or release something, anything... Poetry helps. It can be soothing and/or therapeutic.
Thank you for sharing this with us.
Hang in there and keep writing.
-T_U |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by irisblue on
Saturday, 22nd August 2015 @ 03:03:31 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
thank you for sharing this. I am so so sorry for your loss,
prayers and huggs
irisblue |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on
Saturday, 22nd August 2015 @ 06:02:02 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
How you found the inner strength to write this I will never know.
Must have torn you apart reading the words on this page over again as will now inevitably do to others.
Nobody could fail to be moved
Steve |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 22nd August 2015 @ 10:00:01 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
My sincere condolences to you, Michelle.
This was heartbreaking to read and I salute your ability to share with us.
Hugs,
Scorp. |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 26th August 2015 @ 01:28:00 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
this is beautiful and honest, to share with the world such
sad raw reality, you are brave with your pen, brutal life
can be, now it is one day at a time, one hour at a time,
one breath at a time... i'm always here for you, you
know, i love you my friend:)
@->>->>--- |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Thursday, 8th October 2015 @ 10:40:21 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I am sorry I was not there for you my friend. You are in my prayers.
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 12th June 2016 @ 08:54:49 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Oh Michelle I am so sorry I was not there for you. You break my heart with this ... I am at a loss. I have not been "well" I am so sorry I lost touch when you really needed a friend |
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Re: Shattered me
(User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on
Wednesday, 2nd September 2020 @ 09:58:26 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
It so sad what you have had to deal with.
It makes you wonder if you can survive it all.
So very disturbing. |
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