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Array ( [sid] => 180957 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Sad Life of a Former Optimist [time] => 2015-04-07 20:16:41 [hometext] => This poem was written for cathartic purposes, hoping to connect with people who might understand the same feelings I am feeing. [bodytext] => I don’t have a bad life if only just a sad life
Circumstances brought me low, farther and deeper than I thought I could go
The lower I sink the more I think of how things should have been
The more I sit and ponder the worse my thoughts do wander
My heart sits an empty weight, dragging my soul down like an anchor into a pit of despondency only God could pull me from
I think and dream of wonderful miserable things that fill me with guilt and regret
The life I had in front of me is so far away unforgotten and a nagging tear in the already frayed fabric of my aching falling soul
The heartbreak felt months ago will not mend, will not bend and I cannot escape from the self-inflicted torment
Breaking down inside, outside the walls of my life fall down around me as a sickness, a cancer grows within my family’s mind and body, none are safe, none are whole.
There is none and nothing but the burning anchor that pulls us all into our own hell.
Together but alone we all burn from our own fires, together but completely alone we sit in silence watching the flames burn away the masks we wear. Hiding our faces in shame as the world we knew burns with us.
[comments] => 4 [counter] => 129 [topic] => 39 [informant] => erica23 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Grief )
Sad Life of a Former Optimist

Contributed by erica23 on Tuesday, 7th April 2015 @ 08:16:41 PM in AEST
Topic: Grief



I don’t have a bad life if only just a sad life
Circumstances brought me low, farther and deeper than I thought I could go
The lower I sink the more I think of how things should have been
The more I sit and ponder the worse my thoughts do wander
My heart sits an empty weight, dragging my soul down like an anchor into a pit of despondency only God could pull me from
I think and dream of wonderful miserable things that fill me with guilt and regret
The life I had in front of me is so far away unforgotten and a nagging tear in the already frayed fabric of my aching falling soul
The heartbreak felt months ago will not mend, will not bend and I cannot escape from the self-inflicted torment
Breaking down inside, outside the walls of my life fall down around me as a sickness, a cancer grows within my family’s mind and body, none are safe, none are whole.
There is none and nothing but the burning anchor that pulls us all into our own hell.
Together but alone we all burn from our own fires, together but completely alone we sit in silence watching the flames burn away the masks we wear. Hiding our faces in shame as the world we knew burns with us.




Copyright © erica23 ... [ 2015-04-07 20:16:41]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Sad Life of a Former Optimist (User Rating: 1 )
by mniw on Tuesday, 7th April 2015 @ 08:54:07 PM AEST
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I concur with the whole concept. I too once was an optimist.


Re: Sad Life of a Former Optimist (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Tuesday, 7th April 2015 @ 10:37:51 PM AEST
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warm welcome to ypdc, sad, tho beautifully expressed
and so vividly heartfelt! i look forward to more from you,

hugs n' love nessa


Re: Sad Life of a Former Optimist (User Rating: 1 )
by xHeathenx on Tuesday, 7th April 2015 @ 11:35:32 PM AEST
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Like an African-American model, dark and beautiful. :D
I like the way some lines and words flow, and love the imagery, and the burning of the masks, as well as togetherness, yet solitary existence in hell. :)
I'm an optimistic realistic I suppose. I don't expect the best, but I sure hope for it. I don't expect the worst, but I sure Prepare for it. :)


Re: Sad Life of a Former Optimist (User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on Thursday, 9th April 2015 @ 02:46:29 PM AEST
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Well expressed!
You reminded me that sometimes life just doesn't feel right, even though we can't always put our finger on exactly what it is that is wrong.
I liked it so much I read it twice.

Steve




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