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| Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 29-May 16:02:14 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 180799
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => The Jungle Book for Dummies
[time] => 2015-03-18 01:33:01
[hometext] => Pogivic you inspired me to write a rhyming humorous poem, but rather than have a punchline like a joke, I did it in a different fashion. :)
[bodytext] => There was a boy from civil land Who had never known a guiding hand He always tried to learn from others But he could never persuade the mothers And so he went to the square Walked along the jobs and markets there When something had caught his eye, A remarkably professional skillful guy He saw a man from another land A man with darker skin, not his own olive bland The man had a turban on his head And swords lined up at his market-stead "Step right up!" The stranger yelled "The Great Sadiin!" His sign spelled (Although to be honest the truth, it wasn't even, For in actuality, the man's name was Steven.) He pulled out a dagger And without a stagger He dropped the blade down his throat, Humming with his mouth closed, he sounded like a goat "Teach me your trade, your wondrous ways!" Cried the boy in hopes of amazing new days "Oh?" Said the mouth, of ol' Staviin, "What will you do, when this secret you've seen?" The boy had perked right up! Short but not stout, this little tea-cup! "I'll travel all around the place, And encounter every face! Show them the skills that are in fact real, Those of a man who can swallow steel!" "All right boy." Sadiin had agreed. "But this simple fact, you shall take heed." Sadiin then went on, to tell the boy some more "You can't start this talent, if your skills are so poor. You have to work your way up, to the larger things in store." And so then he grabbed, a pebble from the floor The boy had taken it, with complete intent To drop the pebble down his throat, an insect miscreant But as he let it go, the pebble then got stuck He had choked on it, he hadn't quite had luck "I'm sorry to tell you, my young white friend, But of the life of dagger-eating, this is your end. The likelihood of you doing this, is not even probable. I'm sorry boy but teaching you, this would be impossible." So the boy trudged on, until he reached a scribe Who had elegantly wrote words, with a dancing vibe "Teach me your ways!" Said the boy with utter glee, Without looking the scribe replied "And why is it, that you ask this out of me?" "I want to be when I grow up, a man who writes the laws! Perfecting the written code, that comes of the ruler's jaws!" "Alright." The scribe enthusiastically replied "But to get there, you need the basics now solidified." He made some lines and then asked the boy To dot and cross them, and handed over his writer's toy The boy in anticipation, gave his bottom a quick wiggle, He made his dots, but his lines were utter squiggle The scribe sighed and shook his head He went back to his paper instead "If You were to write your ruler's laws, he would be impeachable. I'm sorry young one but for you, this is unteachable." And so the young one went, leaving the grounds of his town, Feeling embarrassed, a youthful wayward clown Until he saw a bear walking in the wood He wished to be like the bear, if he only could He approached the beast, with a pace made slow His lips made a careful effort, and their words did go: "Excuse me creature, but could you teach me how to be An animal of nature, I really want to see." The bear said nothing, but its face had firmly smiled He climbed onto its back, and it brought him to the wild The bear had begun the lesson, on how to scavenge food Even though its methods, were very much done crude The bear slammed into a tree, and down dropped some fruits The bear had devoured them, right beside its roots The boy had tried as well, by kicking with his boot But all that happened, was he had let out a toot The bear wasn't all too shaken, it had turned its rump It would find something else, to teach the boy that would not stump It brought him to a stream, and caught itself a fish And enjoyed, its tasty aquatic dish The boy had tried as well, to catch the swimmers there, But had fallen in, soaked from toe to hair The bear had shaken, its massive fuzzy head It knew if this boy lived in the wild, he'd be surely dead The bear, used to a life that's tough, Opened up its mouth, and spoke words quite rough "Human and bear life are not comparable. You as a creature, are simply unbearable." [comments] => 4 [counter] => 195 [topic] => 7 [informant] => xHeathenx [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )
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