Poems On Site: 198,500+ Comments On Poems: 427,000+ Forum Posts: 105,000+ |
Custom Search
|
|
||||
Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 29-May 19:40:55 AEST | ||
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
Array
(
[sid] => 173993
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => It Hurts Everyday Now
[time] => 2012-10-11 23:08:20
[hometext] => I'm worried about my condition. There's just no one to talk to anymore. No one but myself.
[bodytext] => My head hurts everyday now. I don't know why I get upset. Just that I do and I want nothing more than to leave the room and sleep where I stand, Hoping that the pain will go away. I can't concentrate in class all the much anymore. The determination to learn is leaving me. Was it ever really there in the first place? All I ever really want to do is draw. Draw, draw, draw Until I can get that perfect picture that I really want, The one where I am someplace different And someone else is there with me, Trapped in a frame of pencil and ink and various color pencils. All for the sake of escaping my vicious reality. Who would want a century of pain? My body hurts all over. Aches and pains in places I'd never have deemed unhealthy, It's a now common corporeality. My eyelids feel heavy... Will I dream tonight? Mother gives me worried looks. I rarely tell her when something is wrong with me, Not unless she had to figure out herself. Already, She has to handle the fact that her own daughter may sport an unhealthy mind, A mind that she herself may have accidentally cultivated without knowing, A stained rose in her garden. I really just want to get better. I want to cry, I need a hug. Not from mother, Or from brother, Or abandoned father. I'm losing everyone I've ever really bothered to hold dear. I don't have a best friend to tell this to, She doesn't talk to me. I don't trust anyone else, Because they frustrate me. I really just want to get better, for all of this to end. ....I don't want to die. Not in a hospital, Or on the inside. I don't want to die. [comments] => 0 [counter] => 138 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Ensis718 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
|