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Array
(
[sid] => 169859
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Little Circle
[time] => 2012-01-02 10:56:37
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => My heart is ready to explode from the pain Tears from my eyes fall like streaming rain My soul cannot handle much more Time to push close this emotional door I don't know the correct way to feel Not even sure what in my life is real I listened to my family, let people back in "You'll feel better, your life will begin, again" I opened my heart, my mind, my trust At first it was good, a glorious rush I was here for everyone, no one left unheeded I was back in the world, felt I'd succeeded It didn't take long, they destroyed my garden They uprooted flowers, pulled vines, didn't ask pardon Same old story, they threw my love in the trash Lies and false stories, my life they bashed Time to take stock, ignore their ringing bell I'm worth more than the words in the lies they tell It's still hard to tell the difference between friend or foe Even with family, it's truly difficult to know My kids tore the biggest hole, it'll never mend, ever They thought I wouldn't notice, ever so clever It did take a while, I gave them the biggest chance All they accomplished was to shorten this family's branch I'd already lost most of my friends when I became ill They had their own lives, I bode them no ill will I'd kept pretty much to myself, didn't want to impose Hard to open those doors after they close There is an upside to this sad and broken heart What my family took from me was actually the start Of love so sweet, boundless, free, it gave me hope My husband and grandson by my side, helping me cope I may have lost parts of my life, little bits of fluff I know now what I want and need, that's enough Spending the rest of the time left to us by God above Surrounding our little circle with joy, hope, endless love [comments] => 3 [counter] => 90 [topic] => 61 [informant] => dvtpdw [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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