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Array
(
[sid] => 168942
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Happy To Be Alive
[time] => 2011-11-30 17:53:19
[hometext] => 5 years ago, I attempted suicide. Age 13 was what I would call "the year in the abyss" for me. Luckily, I've escaped that part of my life both emotionally and mentally 5 years later.
[bodytext] => For those people who don't believe in me Look at my dark past, that'll make 2nd guess ya opinion of me And think twice before you underestimate my ability You'll be asking yaself "He still lived to see 18? Really?" That's right, I did Despite when I was 13 and didn't wanna live Attempting suicide and I was just a kid Who hated his life and just wanted to give...up Feeling like his life really sucked Finally reached the point where he had enough So February 5, 2007 He was ready to make his trip to heaven Til his friend pulled him out the way within a split second That would woulda been the end of it Had it not been for them I woulda never seen my 8th grade graduation But at the time I hated life, I couldn't take it Next step was high school, but could care less if I didn't make it 4 months away from my very first big achievement And bout to throw that away cuz I was breathin Living in a world so evil Don't get me wrong, I still say that even today Just that now, getting even is my way of settling things I'm a vengeful person Yet I always hold back when I'm in a fight Cuz my conscience takes over and makes me do right And walk away from the situation like a punk And I go to sleep at night full of regret Beating myself up, so upset But I'm still alive so that's good enough I guess...... And looking back I become so ashamed of myself for that But despite the misfortune I've seen with my own eyes I couldn't be any happier to be alive [comments] => 1 [counter] => 188 [topic] => 65 [informant] => Blackheart [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => toughstuff )
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