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Array
(
[sid] => 168486
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Schizophrenic Lover feat. America
[time] => 2011-11-10 04:40:53
[hometext] => America I hate football. I burn DVDs and give them to my friends.
[bodytext] => America, you’re my sugar daddy. My Christmas wants are growing longer. America? Why is the best news I can get comes from John Stewart? Instead of labeling our teargas “Made in America” put that on cheap, plastic toys, because I want to feel patriotic while playing with Spongebob. America I hate football. I burn DVDs and give them to my friends. I watch copyrighted material on Youtube. Both my parents are gay. America, I know that doesn’t mean anything. Please don’t leave me. Don’t hit me anymore. Do you even have a plan? Buy me a cheeseburger, America. Please stop picking on the Middle East. You’re so selfish. God, what a Nazi you’ve been lately. I read on the Internet: Obama’s birth certificate is a lie. Also, Charlie Sheen ain’t comin back. America, I heard the gunshots after Richard Poplawski killed three policemen. I didn’t care. Everyone is so cynical. Did you know Trump is our next prez? America, I think Obamacare could save lives which puts me in line with all 50% of you. Maybe we need to quantify the media. They say 80% of the world’s population believes statistics are 99% accurate, even when 60% of the intended audience thought it was crap. Did you know 20% of statistics are made up on the spot? That’s why the poet never lies. America, you’d never lie, would you? Who am I kidding; I heard about Guantanamo Bay. America, I am not so naïve as when you last saw me. You came like a China’s Santa Man, bringing sacrifices of cheap, plastic toys. I WILL RECITE THE FLAG BUT I WILL NOT trust you anymore. America, buy me an Ipod. I know you really want to be like Japan and France That Middle East should try being a Superpower, see how they like it. Don’t cry, America. I’ll protect you from them Muslims and homos. Them Muslims are bombing NYC tonight. America, I sympathize with Al Qaeda’s wife and children. Thank you for letting me trash you in front of him. I’ll let you out on leash if you promise not to extort. America, you are my slave. America, I’m performing CPR on your lungs, that is, the mass inflation and oil prices and companies transferred overseas. We need each other. Don’t die. Don’t die. [comments] => 0 [counter] => 75 [topic] => 25 [informant] => RowanFiorilli [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => MiscPoems )
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