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bright and frantic

Contributed by ming on Saturday, 13th August 2011 @ 07:42:49 PM in AEST
Topic: abstract



visual spikes
under
tucked tight
nightmares

staring at
ENDS
advoiding
mirrors

with all the
subtlety
of a tropical
storm

and
a thousand
letters
words

thoughts
clattering
like dying
crickets

nagging
interior monologue
petitions
flying

by
guilt and doubt
oh weary
forebrain.




Copyright © ming ... [ 2011-08-13 19:42:49]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: bright and frantic (User Rating: 1 )
by poeticjestix on Sunday, 14th August 2011 @ 10:00:52 AM AEST
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real stand-up poetry there. Thanks for sharing


Re: bright and frantic (User Rating: 1 )
by UNORTHODOX on Sunday, 14th August 2011 @ 10:18:36 AM AEST
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You have a flow which can't be ignored
my mind like a punching bag for your array of intellect
"thoughts clattering like dying crickets" pure metaphoric genius
with out a doubt you own the artistic regions of your soul

-UNORTHODOX



Re: bright and frantic (User Rating: 1 )
by Sagefairy on Monday, 15th August 2011 @ 03:38:15 PM AEST
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Juxtaposition between the quote and the poem is interesting. Seems written in an introspective manner which I find intriguing. Nicely done!


Re: bright and frantic (User Rating: 1 )
by duff on Wednesday, 17th August 2011 @ 12:26:37 AM AEST
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Another incredibly original and creative piece of work you have here...your words lure the reader in til the end...a nice piece of writing...well done


Re: bright and frantic (User Rating: 1 )
by Aspirant on Sunday, 21st August 2011 @ 02:16:35 AM AEST
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Mesmerizing. The first stanza scared me. The second felt like jealousy. The concepts seem to flow back into the words as new ones emerge, yet there is no trace of transition in this seamless piece of art.

There's also something insistently honest about this write, which is the best feature good writing can have as far as I'm concerned. While all your writes are full of imagery and creativity, none have held my attention in a vice like this one. Fine work.




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