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Array
(
[sid] => 166647
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Visible with Hidden pain.
[time] => 2011-06-28 09:23:28
[hometext] => Acne. It's ruled over my life from the age of around 9 I guess. . . it hurts, physically, mentally. It's so hard to talk about.
[bodytext] => It’s not something I usually write about it’s something people can already see But I try so hard to keep going and pretending That’s it’s not there, not effecting me. I battle past it with smiles and cheek And I forget about it all But nothing works, nothings working Just another fail. It makes me feel dirty, disgusting I am never quite clean I can scrub and place chemicals upon chemicals But still this major flaw is seen. I guess something it’s better than others Then another fierce attack Something I can think that it’s all gone I look in the mirror and it comes flooding back. It devours at my skin With its claws full of heavy poison I try to fight it, I try so hard Again, I lost, it won. Numerous thing I have tried To feel happy and confident I just want to look beautiful, feel clean Just for one moment. Nobody knows it affects me that much Nobody knows about the pain The physical throbbing, the mentally draining I just want it all away… [comments] => 2 [counter] => 186 [topic] => 61 [informant] => CommasCanSeperate [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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