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Array
(
[sid] => 164155
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Reality
[time] => 2011-01-08 00:36:52
[hometext] => First thing I have written in a year. Three days of staring at a blank page before I could get anything out but in the end it felt good. My confused thoughts on life.
[bodytext] => Tell me this isn't all just a dream A convincing and detailed scheme Tell me everything I know is real The thoughts I think and the things that I feel How can this really be the world that I've made Everything I know is just one big masquerade I've gotten lost in the maze that I've created Always chasing after signs, often unrelated I look in the mirror, not sure of what I see A human face, but is that really me? I pass by blank faces every day Always so thoughtless, nothing to say The words I speak sound so hollow and fake Every breath I breathe feels like a mistake I've always been the outcast never one to belong Whenever I tried to fit in, it just felt so wrong Slowly watching life unravel with helpless eyes Pain and cruelty, a game where everyone dies Surely I am just another pawn on the board Moving blindly after an unknown reward Reality feels like dreaming, the line is blurred It doesn't feel real, not an action or a word I've seen the glitches we're not meant to find I lost the argument that it's all inside my mind Could I wake up to see if it has all been a lie? Give everything up and face the final goodbye. Could it be worth more then what I would lose? The choice would be mine, possible to refuse With reality easy to create and define Could I step past the imaginary line? See the world that has been left untried Face the truth of what waits on the other side Tell me, is all of this really just a dream? A convincing and detailed scheme. Tell me, is anything I know real? The thoughts I think, the things I feel. [comments] => 3 [counter] => 181 [topic] => 61 [informant] => Nothingness [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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