Your Poetry Dot Com

Welcome to Your Poetry Dot Com - Read, Rate, Comment on, or Submit Poetry. Browse Poetry Forums, or just enjoy other parts of our poetic community.
One of the largest databases of poetry on the net, now over 198,500+ poems!

Poems On Site: 198,500+ Comments On Poems: 427,000+ Forum Posts: 105,000+

Custom Search


Welcome !	Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link	29-May 16:13:44 AEST

Menu

· Our eBay Store

· Error Submit

Poetry

· Submit Poetry

· Least Read Poems

· Members Listing

· Old Site Post 2001

· Old Site Pre 2001

· Poetry Archive

· Public Domain Poetry

Stories

· Stories (NEW ! )

· Submit Story

· Story Topics

· Stories Archive

· Story Search

Community

· Our Poetry Forums

· Our Arcade
100's of Games !

Site Help

· FAQ

· Feedback

Members Areas

· Your Account

· Members Journals

· Premium Sign-Up

Premium Section

· Special Section

· Premium Poems

· Premium Submit

· Premium Search

· Premium Archive

· Premium Topics

Fun & Games

· Jokes

· Bubble Puzzle

· Cross Word Easy

· Word Hunt

Reference

· Dictionary (Rhyming)

· Site Updates

· Special Content

Search

Top

Help This Site

· Donations

Others

· Moderators

Our Other Sites

· Embroidery Design Store
· Your Jokes
· Special Urls
· JM Embroideries
· Public Domain Poetry and Stories
· Diamond Dotz
· Cooking Info and Recipes
· Quoof - Australian Story

Social

Array ( [sid] => 163648 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => A View of Rejection [time] => 2010-12-11 01:46:23 [hometext] => [bodytext] => Flesh oh my flesh!

Sorrow stirs the waters of enlightenment
Till shadows and darkness part and
Hidden waters lay still
Searching through veils of salt, focus
Sharpens and there abandoned to a
Frozen cavern, a slab of discarded
Offal
Butchered
Numbness and curiosity strong enough to hold
That moment
For but
A second,
Then the rise and fall, the
Movement
Beating slowly Beating.
Shrouded
In icy vapour.

Beating!
Why still beating?
Eyes fixed
Staring
Upward to the beauty that surrounds
This scene of grotesqueness, of
Struggle
Stalactites formed from years of deposition
Poised.
Clarity!
Eyes wide open
Then from the corner the moment
Unfolds.
Realisation screams into view!
Paralysed.
Before
Icy spear plunges and pierces
A bloody tear trickles

Eyes shut!

[comments] => 7 [counter] => 267 [topic] => 48 [informant] => northernlights [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 16 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )

A View of Rejection

Contributed by northernlights on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 01:46:23 AM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

Flesh oh my flesh!

Sorrow stirs the waters of enlightenment
Till shadows and darkness part and
Hidden waters lay still
Searching through veils of salt, focus
Sharpens and there abandoned to a
Frozen cavern, a slab of discarded
Offal
Butchered
Numbness and curiosity strong enough to hold
That moment
For but
A second,
Then the rise and fall, the
Movement
Beating slowly Beating.
Shrouded
In icy vapour.

Beating!
Why still beating?
Eyes fixed
Staring
Upward to the beauty that surrounds
This scene of grotesqueness, of
Struggle
Stalactites formed from years of deposition
Poised.
Clarity!
Eyes wide open
Then from the corner the moment
Unfolds.
Realisation screams into view!
Paralysed.
Before
Icy spear plunges and pierces
A bloody tear trickles

Eyes shut!

Copyright © northernlights ... [ 2010-12-11 01:46:23]
(Date/Time posted on site)

Advertisments:

Previous Posted Poem | | Next Posted Poem

Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more

All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title etc.

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by MiaPeterson on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 04:45:39 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Stunning poem. I also have to say that you have a very unique view of rejection, and you were able to share your opinion through such wonderful words. Congratulations!

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by ming on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 09:31:11 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Very nicely done...I want to steal this line. (ha!)
'through veils of salt'

ming

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by DrcGaimer on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 09:37:41 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

As always my friend, powerful and stirring words. You really have a talent for penning thoughts and emotions to paper.

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by UAnwar on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 09:11:53 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Beautiful.

"Upward to the beauty that surrounds
This scene of grotesqueness, of"

I admire how these two lines break the pace and the "beating" that flows through the centre of your rythm.

Furthermore the position of the word 'of' after the comma is well placed for a return down from the (perfect) above. A return to the rythm. (Very well thought out).

This poem is very emotionally driven and the way you portrayl the emotional plight of escape from the material is truely majestic.

Lovely work.

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Saturday, 11th December 2010 @ 09:48:41 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is the kind of poem I can just become awe struck from.WOW! AMAZING!

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by mehuel on Sunday, 12th December 2010 @ 09:46:55 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

beautifully written, every emotion is so profoundly penned down.. very touching, loved every bit of it... Great work...

Re: A View of Rejection (User Rating: 1 )
by duff on Sunday, 12th December 2010 @ 08:36:09 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

A creative take on rejection with a unique style to reveal it. You have captured a puzzling emotion in a way that is intelligent and the well written lines drive it home. Your consistency is something to be admired and it's always a pleasure.

duff

While every care is taken to ensure the general sites content is family safe, our moderators cannot be in all places; all the time. Please report poetry and or comments that are in breach of our site rules HERE (Please include poem title or url). Parents also please ensure that you supervise your children well when they are on the internet; regardless of what a site says about being, or being considered, child-safe.

Poetry is much like a great photo, a single "moment in time" capturing many feelings and emotions. Yet, they are very alive; creating stirrings within the readers who form visual "pictures" of the expressed emotions within the Poem. ©

Opinions expressed in the poetry, comments, forums etc. on this site are not necessarily those of this site, its owners and/or operators; but of the individuals who post items to this site.
Frequently Asked Questions | | | Privacy Policy | | | Contact Webmaster

All submitted items are Copyright © to their submitter. All the rest Copyright © 2002-2050 by Your Poetry Dot Com

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owners.

Script Generation Time: 0.052 Seconds. - View our Site Map | .© your-poetry.com