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Array ( [sid] => 16113 [catid] => 1 [aid] => Mick [title] => Suicide Sweet 16 [time] => 2003-04-16 20:05:00 [hometext] => Sweet 16...not as sweet is it? What do you think? I'd love some feedback on it...see if i can make it better. I don't think its as great as it could be...you decide..*Jo [bodytext] => I can picture it now
It seems so clear
The idea I have continued to bare
My birthday seems like such a good time
To escape the hell thats been flying by.
Why put it off?
Why wait for this day?
To show sweet 16 can be so fake.
I'll rejuvenate to a different world
Say goodbye to the Birthday Girl.
The Twenty-Fifth day of the month November
Surely all of you will remember
How 16 candles lie on a forbidden cake
Waiting to be blown out by my spirits shake.
Soon soiceity will talk about
And Heavens skies are filled with doubt.
I gave a new name to "Sweet 16"
One more vulgar...
More obscene.
Its not as sweet as one may think it be
Its just a shortcut to tragedy...
But i can't help if i make it this way
I'm still 16 I can celebrate...
It might be darker and not as Pink
Remembering the blade with just one blink.
"She didn't kill herself...its just a dream
Come on be realistic, it wuz her sweet 16."
Why don't you get what sweet 16 hides?
Its just a day for suicide.

[comments] => 4 [counter] => 219 [topic] => 36 [informant] => DeLeriousTearZ [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )

Suicide Sweet 16

Contributed by DeLeriousTearZ on Wednesday, 16th April 2003 @ 08:05:00 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide

I can picture it now
It seems so clear
The idea I have continued to bare
My birthday seems like such a good time
To escape the hell thats been flying by.
Why put it off?
Why wait for this day?
To show sweet 16 can be so fake.
I'll rejuvenate to a different world
Say goodbye to the Birthday Girl.
The Twenty-Fifth day of the month November
Surely all of you will remember
How 16 candles lie on a forbidden cake
Waiting to be blown out by my spirits shake.
Soon soiceity will talk about
And Heavens skies are filled with doubt.
I gave a new name to "Sweet 16"
One more vulgar...
More obscene.
Its not as sweet as one may think it be
Its just a shortcut to tragedy...
But i can't help if i make it this way
I'm still 16 I can celebrate...
It might be darker and not as Pink
Remembering the blade with just one blink.
"She didn't kill herself...its just a dream
Come on be realistic, it wuz her sweet 16."
Why don't you get what sweet 16 hides?
Its just a day for suicide.

Copyright © DeLeriousTearZ ... [ 2003-04-16 20:05:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Suicide Sweet 16 (User Rating: 1 )
by Metalmouth666 on Friday, 18th April 2003 @ 11:40:47 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

It's a very good poem, it really is, It seems to me that your trying to show some pain inside that you just want to hide. the whole fact of it being called "sweet 16" who knows how that ever showed up.
15, 16, and 17 are really tough ages, trust me I know, I just turned 18 and it has seemed to get better, as well as some of my friends. Just to tell you create your own sweet 16, as you want it, just make sure your around for your next years, who knows they just might be one of the best years of your life. so stick around... Again, great write.
~MetalMouth666 (Ryan)

Re: Suicide Sweet 16 (User Rating: 1 )
by DeLeriousTearZ on Saturday, 19th April 2003 @ 07:55:33 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Hey, thanx ryan for posting that comment and telling me to hang in .... i'll try! You seem like a great person.*Jo

Re: Suicide Sweet 16 (User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-Cry on Saturday, 19th April 2003 @ 11:34:29 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

i loved it love it loved it!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Suicide Sweet 16 (User Rating: 1 )
by grip-wth-broken-fingers on Friday, 16th July 2004 @ 04:17:38 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

***** brilliant i liek it i liike it aloot i liek all ur poems actually thank u xx read mine

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