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Array ( [sid] => 160239 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => At a loss for words [time] => 2010-05-30 00:16:19 [hometext] => [bodytext] => The thoughts inside I can't express
when put to pen equate to less
than what I'd hoped. For how I feel
a loss for words cannot reveal.
No matter what I say or write
the color of the words are white.
Rhyme and meter are intact
but feeling in my words is lacked.
So I'm left to try my best
and use these words that can't suggest
the feelings that move deep inside.
An insight they just can't provide.
My words are failing now to show
what I've wanted from the go.
In that case I guess I'll resign
and end them with this sterile line.

hanasuru, PLEASE: To help keep this site INTERACTIVE, please read and comment on at least 3 poems for each one you submit. [comments] => 6 [counter] => 326 [topic] => 61 [informant] => hanasuru [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 20 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )

At a loss for words

Contributed by hanasuru on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 12:16:19 AM in AEST
Topic: selfstruggles

The thoughts inside I can't express
when put to pen equate to less
than what I'd hoped. For how I feel
a loss for words cannot reveal.
No matter what I say or write
the color of the words are white.
Rhyme and meter are intact
but feeling in my words is lacked.
So I'm left to try my best
and use these words that can't suggest
the feelings that move deep inside.
An insight they just can't provide.
My words are failing now to show
what I've wanted from the go.
In that case I guess I'll resign
and end them with this sterile line.

hanasuru, PLEASE: To help keep this site INTERACTIVE, please read and comment on at least 3 poems for each one you submit.

Copyright © hanasuru ... [ 2010-05-30 00:16:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 12:44:25 AM AEST
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A modern take on the belief that language is a virus - an articulation that falls far short of the actual feeling or conception it is meant to embody. Rest assured - Shakespeare and Sappho and every poet, artist and wordsmith that have ever been has felt the same - and still produced glimmers of the Universal.

Spike

Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by cashfan1 on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 12:49:39 AM AEST
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well written, this poem has a great flow to it.

Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by laststarontheleft on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 03:35:12 AM AEST
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Your talent for the muse even in times of self struggle and doubt are indeed captivating.
I admire your honesty, talent and wit!
Keep going poppet... keep going, You ARE glimmering x
Star x x x

Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by 143 on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 06:36:43 AM AEST
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Very Impressive write!
Very unique ...

Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by Ambivalence on Sunday, 30th May 2010 @ 06:58:32 PM AEST
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oh wow this is like a new genre of poetry!
sometimes, well almost always,
our words can't encompass the whole picture of our thoughts/feelings
esp. how we're supposed to make the poem look/sound pretty,
and you've captured that very well here.
I'm sure you will be writing more of what you need to say...

take care

-K.Z.

Re: At a loss for words (User Rating: 1 )
by Horia on Saturday, 5th June 2010 @ 03:04:03 PM AEST
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this is art

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