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Array ( [sid] => 159995 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => the original clock... [time] => 2010-05-20 10:06:57 [hometext] => [bodytext] => listen to the original clock
of time
as it ticks

tragically waiting to unwind
before
the last grain has hit

its last breath of upper air

AUTHORS PLEASE: To help keep this site INTERACTIVE, please read and comment on at least 3 poems for each one you submit. [comments] => 3 [counter] => 139 [topic] => 73 [informant] => omeoteotl [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => abstract )

the original clock...

Contributed by omeoteotl on Thursday, 20th May 2010 @ 10:06:57 AM in AEST
Topic: abstract

listen to the original clock
of time
as it ticks

tragically waiting to unwind
before
the last grain has hit

its last breath of upper air

AUTHORS PLEASE: To help keep this site INTERACTIVE, please read and comment on at least 3 poems for each one you submit.

Copyright © omeoteotl ... [ 2010-05-20 10:06:57]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: the original clock... (User Rating: 1 )
by cashfan1 on Thursday, 20th May 2010 @ 12:32:07 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

nice words i really like the style.
look forward to reading more.

Re: the original clock... (User Rating: 1 )
by fish on Thursday, 20th May 2010 @ 08:26:11 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

though this is beautiful but did you imagine it in couplets? it may make it more deep and captivating.
great idea and simply put.

Re: the original clock... (User Rating: 1 )
by Ambivalence on Sunday, 23rd May 2010 @ 11:18:48 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

scary enough, the last line halted my breath for a split second,
as if a hint of what death feels like...
this was abstract indeed. great write....

take care

-K.Z.

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