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Thunder
Contributed by
inevitable
on
Wednesday, 25th November 2009 @ 02:24:40 PM in AEST
Topic:
ambiguous
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Dark eyes
filled with sad
and lonely thoughts
heart
so corrosive
so petal frail
an empty promise
a loose fitting ring
(the uselessness)
of it all
Raindrop tears
and blue, blue skies
gray overcast clouds
clouds of smoky opium waves
weaving it's way through me
~Do you feel me?~
Love seems
open to interpretation
ambiguous
heartfelt
deep or run down?
hands reaching for hands?
intimate boundaries
the walls tearing down
(the petals fall)
Copyright ©
inevitable
... [
2009-11-25 14:24:40] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Thunder
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Friday, 27th November 2009 @ 08:49:19 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I love the creativity of this, especially these bits:
'heart
so corrosive
so petal frail'
I think 'petal frail' is an excellent little phrase.
'clouds of smoky opium waves
weaving it's way through me'
A good bit of imagery.
And I thought the last stanza was powerfully profound.
Excellent work!
-Phil
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Re: Thunder
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 8th April 2010 @ 10:42:42 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Definitely ambiguous; definitely damn interesting. Highly creative. |
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