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Array ( [sid] => 154987 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Together [time] => 2009-11-13 06:42:49 [hometext] => [bodytext] => i envy people sometimes.
some people.
couples mainly.

i sit alone
on a
coffee counter stool
and
eat.

next to me
in a booth
sits a young couple.

they look good.

they laugh
hold hands
eat.
... together.

i think back to the time when i was
... together.

it really wasn't
all that great.

so in jealousy i sit here and think ...

"they're probably not all that happy".

they finish eating and leave the money on the table.

the girl makes a joke about the tip.

they
laugh
and
kiss
and hold hands
as they walk out the door.

i watch them get into their car.
they kiss while pulling across the safety belts.

they smile to each other and
drive off.

"maybe they'll fight
when they get home". [comments] => 7 [counter] => 262 [topic] => 43 [informant] => dirk-velvet [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 13 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )

Together

Contributed by dirk-velvet on Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 06:42:49 AM in AEST
Topic: oops

i envy people sometimes.
some people.
couples mainly.

i sit alone
on a
coffee counter stool
and
eat.

next to me
in a booth
sits a young couple.

they look good.

they laugh
hold hands
eat.
... together.

i think back to the time when i was
... together.

it really wasn't
all that great.

so in jealousy i sit here and think ...

"they're probably not all that happy".

they finish eating and leave the money on the table.

the girl makes a joke about the tip.

they
laugh
and
kiss
and hold hands
as they walk out the door.

i watch them get into their car.
they kiss while pulling across the safety belts.

they smile to each other and
drive off.

"maybe they'll fight
when they get home".

Copyright © dirk-velvet ... [ 2009-11-13 06:42:49]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by laststarontheleft on Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 07:54:28 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is a very interesting poem.
Your scars are very apparent here,
and I really hope you find some
happiness very soon.
Best wishes Last Star x x x

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by longhaircg on Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 08:48:24 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

yes this so sad to think this way, I still believe in love and it only hurts when its not there, I hope you find that one day, I would do it again in a heart beat,
sp

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 05:54:09 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I'm sorry dirk, I know that you must have some painful memories in your
past, (who doesn't right?), but I actually got a chuckle out of the last two
lines. Wow. Now THAT is a perfect description of sour grapes if I've ever
seen one. I have felt what your narrator does. I won't assume this is from
real life, but if it is, just know you are not alone. Humans are hopeless.
We have chronic "grass-is-always-greener" syndrome. We are never
satisfied.

Excellent piece. Stirs the depths of the reader.

~ Breezy

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by ming on Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 07:28:40 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

DV,
Obviously from the 3 comments before mine you can tell that you have written an excellent poem. You pullled us in and we felt. Way to go...

ming

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by joydeep_nath on Sunday, 22nd November 2009 @ 03:23:27 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

hi there good

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by 143 on Friday, 4th December 2009 @ 11:52:03 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

The old dust always settles my friend
"We all know that"

Reguardless who you are , Money don't matter...Even tiger woods will tell you that lol

Re: Together (User Rating: 1 )
by kleetas on Friday, 4th December 2009 @ 12:39:55 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

maybe on their way home they will see a lady biker on a bonneville with a silly smile on her face and they'll say...i wish we had a motorcycle and a silly grin on our faces!

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