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Array ( [sid] => 15441 [catid] => 1 [aid] => Mick [title] => dear Tom [time] => 2003-04-02 04:08:38 [hometext] => in loving memory of all my lost friends [bodytext] => sitting here wondering what i did wrong in the past life... seems as though no matter how hard i try i can't stay happy... whats wrong with me... i have the love of my life, court. but i still feel useless... i'm not understanding these feelings at all... i just wished theyd' go away. i'm not misfortuned... and i'm not dying... so why do i feel so down all the time... it's as though i can't be happy... like i don't know how... when happy days do come my way they only last a couple mins... then there goes the saddness again... sometimes i think the world wasn't meant for me...i must have been a bad person in my past life... it seems like when bad turns to worse something else turns even worse... i've lost a total 11 friends from freak accidents, murder, and illness... ev'ry one of them i've admired as being well accomplished young ppl. my friend tom... i expected him to live forever...he was so young and already so successful... when i heard what had happended to him over the phone the next morning, i couldn't believe... i wouldn't believe... not till i went to his funeral and watched them lowering the casket... in a way now i still find it hard to believe he's gone... i keep asking myself why him... why not me instead... he had plans, he was brillant, he was guaranteed success... after his death i couldn't look at life the same way... i used to think life was a trophy... now i realize there is no such thing as life itself... just a part of ones imagination...
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 162 [topic] => 55 [informant] => bluebxer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => dedicatedpoems )
dear Tom

Contributed by bluebxer on Wednesday, 2nd April 2003 @ 04:08:38 AM in AEST
Topic: dedicatedpoems



sitting here wondering what i did wrong in the past life... seems as though no matter how hard i try i can't stay happy... whats wrong with me... i have the love of my life, court. but i still feel useless... i'm not understanding these feelings at all... i just wished theyd' go away. i'm not misfortuned... and i'm not dying... so why do i feel so down all the time... it's as though i can't be happy... like i don't know how... when happy days do come my way they only last a couple mins... then there goes the saddness again... sometimes i think the world wasn't meant for me...i must have been a bad person in my past life... it seems like when bad turns to worse something else turns even worse... i've lost a total 11 friends from freak accidents, murder, and illness... ev'ry one of them i've admired as being well accomplished young ppl. my friend tom... i expected him to live forever...he was so young and already so successful... when i heard what had happended to him over the phone the next morning, i couldn't believe... i wouldn't believe... not till i went to his funeral and watched them lowering the casket... in a way now i still find it hard to believe he's gone... i keep asking myself why him... why not me instead... he had plans, he was brillant, he was guaranteed success... after his death i couldn't look at life the same way... i used to think life was a trophy... now i realize there is no such thing as life itself... just a part of ones imagination...




Copyright © bluebxer ... [ 2003-04-02 04:08:38]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: dear Tom (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Monday, 21st April 2003 @ 12:33:47 PM AEST
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I dont know where I missed this poem. I know how you feel. I too have lost many friends. Very heartbreaking. Peace too you
Michelle


Re: dear Tom (User Rating: 1 )
by Daydreamer on Friday, 14th November 2003 @ 11:43:00 PM AEST
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I know how you feel about losing friends at first I thought life was a fun game that I would win but now the more I live the less I want to continue playing this game. It feels like God has his judgement, of who needs to be taken home and who to stay and continue on with the fight, is backwards. `Day`




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