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Array
(
[sid] => 152192
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Grasping the Darkness, Expecting to Shine
[time] => 2009-08-12 10:23:54
[hometext] => In the darkest day of your life, pent up anger lets through your destructive side.
[bodytext] => You sat in that chair, yet stood over me I consider myself a fighter, but even I was afraid to breathe. Grabbing whatever metal you had smacking me with it until it broke open and landed next to me. Screaming and shouting like you always do, a pathetic masquerade I see through. When in this state you let out the truth. You see yourself in me, but you're nothing like what I want to be. Your emotional state is highly unstable and I simply am no longer able to do this anymore. You scream in my face that everything I say is a lie I just sit there and wish that you would die. Funerals are dull, but I'd dutifully attend. If for nothing else, then just to see Daddy's eyes, which he tries to hide as he cries. If it were me, would you be able to stand by, look at my grave, and not cry? The way things are and keep going, Somehow I just know it. I wouldn't cry, not if you died. See how you push me over the edge? Making me slip over the ledge, turning me into what I don't want to be, Creating scars that no one can see. So why not take my sleeping aids Drift off into a drowsy abyss or take a blade to my wrist? Deeper and deeper, the pain growing steeper. Until the walls echo the heart now still, the sound of dying by one's own will. Screams of pain and feeling unwanted, slowly slipping out of reality. What the hell is wrong with me, to think this way. I want my mother to die? What a terrible thing to say. I hear slam into my head again. Find a better place to stay, You better find a good damn way, to make it through one more year, You're about to lose everything you hold dear. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 160 [topic] => 13 [informant] => flamingblade [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 3 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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