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Array ( [sid] => 145628 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Pantomime [time] => 2008-10-10 01:18:13 [hometext] => I realize that I keep banging my head on the same rock, but it can't be helped. It's the same terrible pain that keeps hurting more than anything ever has...and I keep trying to make sense of it. [bodytext] => God, I hope there’s a reason for this pain
For the absence of everything that made me
That made me feel anything other than empty
Anything that even resembled happiness

You just don’t know how dark it is in this shadow
How far back it really rolls now
How it’s become everything like nothing before it
Like nothing it’ll ever be, how could it?

It’s a kind life that’s bigger than every other part
But it’s not really any kind life at all
Just me flailing helplessly in the maelstrom
While everyone else rides the wind

I pantomime and go through the motions
Because it’s what they expect from all this time
What they will accept or turn away from
Fed up and not willing to hear it all again

I don’t want to die this way, this lost
This desperate to shed the past
While dragging it all into the future
Because it was the very best of all that I knew

Still, if it comes to it, I’ll accept that price
I’ll accept that the loss is mine to bear
Just like the rest of it is, mine and mine alone
I just hope that there’s a reason for this pain

[comments] => 6 [counter] => 279 [topic] => 75 [informant] => Loende [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )

Pantomime

Contributed by Loende on Friday, 10th October 2008 @ 01:18:13 AM in AEST
Topic: anguished

God, I hope there’s a reason for this pain
For the absence of everything that made me
That made me feel anything other than empty
Anything that even resembled happiness

You just don’t know how dark it is in this shadow
How far back it really rolls now
How it’s become everything like nothing before it
Like nothing it’ll ever be, how could it?

It’s a kind life that’s bigger than every other part
But it’s not really any kind life at all
Just me flailing helplessly in the maelstrom
While everyone else rides the wind

I pantomime and go through the motions
Because it’s what they expect from all this time
What they will accept or turn away from
Fed up and not willing to hear it all again

I don’t want to die this way, this lost
This desperate to shed the past
While dragging it all into the future
Because it was the very best of all that I knew

Still, if it comes to it, I’ll accept that price
I’ll accept that the loss is mine to bear
Just like the rest of it is, mine and mine alone
I just hope that there’s a reason for this pain

Copyright Â© Loende ... [ 2008-10-10 01:18:13]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by karoody on Saturday, 11th October 2008 @ 04:16:30 AM AEST
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You have done an awesome job here. I can feel your pain and desperation. I hope that you see brighter days soon.
Thank you
Kara

Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Saturday, 11th October 2008 @ 09:44:23 AM AEST
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Dearest Dawn... there is reason for your pain. It will make you stronger, and it will bring you closer to people who truly love you. The people who turn away, they are not worth your tears. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but I can see you getting stronger, and you will feel it too, eventually. Ride out the storm.

Sometimes if you ride into the maelstrom, it's motion will shoot you out the other side. And you know, I'm here with you. Always.

Love you, dear sister.

Phil xxx

Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on Tuesday, 21st October 2008 @ 09:59:50 PM AEST
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Dearest Dawn~
Yes there is a reason for the pain. My dearest
Dawn what doesn't break us makes us stronger.
You are a courageous lady. I admire you and
have seen your strength that has pulled you
through your tough times. You are an incredible
soul and there is so much more to you dear
poetess. Writing helps heal our wounded heart.
Wishing you the strength to overcome all that tries
to keep you down. Chin up my sweet friend. Brighter
days are headed your way.
A touching write beautifully penned as is all of
your amazing poetry my dear friend.
Here's to sunshine on rainy days~
love, hugs & prayers,
dreamer

Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on Wednesday, 19th November 2008 @ 01:31:39 AM AEST
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Well put, the imagery in this one is strong. I like the second stanza because it is a little disjointed for you, i.e. dares to rummage a little with word order/structure, maybe leaving out a connecting element or two. That's no bad thing in poetry. Methinks you should try mixing things up a little more often. Be unexpected in your verseform, it goes well.

- A

Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on Friday, 27th March 2009 @ 01:45:27 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I can not speak about the art of writing..
I sincerely feel this is your inner self
flowing out in a stream of consciousness..
Peace be with you:-)venkat

Re: Pantomime (User Rating: 1 )
by northernlights on Monday, 10th May 2010 @ 03:49:24 AM AEST
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I just hope that there's a reason for this pain,no matter what we go through we are always searching for that grain of hope and while we are looking we are yearning to remove the clowns face that we use day to day. very honest and sensitive write

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