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Array
(
[sid] => 14392
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Morbid / Have You Ever Felt Like...?
[time] => 2003-03-17 07:30:00
[hometext] => an unsettling thought process that tumbled from my mind like so much *****, another vein of thought slit wide to bleed forth for your displeasure and disgust.
[bodytext] => have you ever felt like
the walls were caving in? like your life was falling down around you? like nothing really mattered anymore? have you ever felt like your best would never be good enough? like no matter what you did, somewhere, someone was doing it twice as well, in half the time? have you ever felt like just simply giving up? watching the world fade away as you slipped into the sweet sleep of death have you ever felt like killing everything you love? just so you could prove to yourself that there is a sorrow deeper than the one you feel each day? just to know that it could actually get worse? have you ever felt like it's all just one big ***** circle? that no matter what path you chose you'd just end up back where you started, alone, afraid, and weary? have you ever felt like opening a ***** vein and drowning the world in the deluge of your anguished blood? slowly dying to the sweet symphony of the pain filled shrieks of the earth have you ever felt like this is the way it will always be? like, no matter how much you squirm or how frantically you try to escape, you will always be the bug under god's boot? have you ever stopped and realized that you were born to die? that you are just passing through on your way to "the great beyond" on your way to the endless void hurtling towards Nothing, one breath at a time have you ever romanticized the thought of your death? ever dreamed of what true suicide feels like? not that near-death ***** i mean real no-turning-back suicide that cold steel kiss on your soft warm wrist the soothing sensation of being emptied one slit at a time and that satisfying knowledge you'd get right as everything went grey that this is the last moment of your life your colorless, drying blood painting the floor your lungs, struggling for needless air your heart slowing, sputtering towards it's final beat the entire machine that is you winding down the last tear you'll ever be forced to shed slowly climbing down your face abandoning the sinking ship of your life and just before the lights go out staring at the face of Death smiling and saying "i'm ready to go" have you ever felt like that? [comments] => 4 [counter] => 368 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Cancer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 15 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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