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Array ( [sid] => 141702 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => The Breakup [time] => 2008-04-19 12:41:42 [hometext] => [bodytext] => Me

I touch my neck where you last kissed me,
it is a delicate, painful, blister
searing through my body.

I speak your name in that familiar tone,
hearing it is an open wound
raw and gaping.

I cry until my whole body shakes
in heaving, violent tremors,
it is my heart on the fault line.

My mind struggles to hold my thoughts
as you have become all consuming.
the days are neverending......

Him

In his world the shades of blue in the sky never fade.
He breathes fresh air through an open smile
and sits on the beach awhile contemplating only the beauty of a seagull in flight.
At night he sleeps so well that only the sun smiling down on him can wake him up.
The days pass quickly.... [comments] => 5 [counter] => 218 [topic] => 43 [informant] => jantra [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 15 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )

The Breakup

Contributed by jantra on Saturday, 19th April 2008 @ 12:41:42 PM in AEST
Topic: oops

Me

I touch my neck where you last kissed me,
it is a delicate, painful, blister
searing through my body.

I speak your name in that familiar tone,
hearing it is an open wound
raw and gaping.

I cry until my whole body shakes
in heaving, violent tremors,
it is my heart on the fault line.

My mind struggles to hold my thoughts
as you have become all consuming.
the days are neverending......

Him

In his world the shades of blue in the sky never fade.
He breathes fresh air through an open smile
and sits on the beach awhile contemplating only the beauty of a seagull in flight.
At night he sleeps so well that only the sun smiling down on him can wake him up.
The days pass quickly....

Copyright © jantra ... [ 2008-04-19 12:41:42]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: The Breakup (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Saturday, 19th April 2008 @ 02:20:58 PM AEST
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Bravo! I will start by saying I loved the play on words. Poetic in every way. I loved the feelings it left me while reading, you took me on several levels.

Nice work!

Michelle

Re: The Breakup (User Rating: 1 )
by Muhammadshanazar on Saturday, 19th April 2008 @ 06:43:17 PM AEST
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Callousness of Man and steadfastness of Woman has been brought to light. The poem expresses general tragedy of the modern times. The most precious item in the world is a heart, it must never be shattered and trampled at any cost. Nice souls write nice pieces, it is a natural flow of an innocent being. Images of blister, rw gaping wound are very unusual.
Muhammad Shanazar

Re: The Breakup (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Saturday, 19th April 2008 @ 10:41:39 PM AEST
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Great poem. Something I can relate to.

Re: The Breakup (User Rating: 1 )
by ZiggyB on Sunday, 20th April 2008 @ 12:19:20 AM AEST
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He is not experiencing the pain that you are.

The object is to make yourself well.

Good write.

Re: The Breakup (User Rating: 1 )
by PhantomVampyress on Sunday, 20th April 2008 @ 07:23:48 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

this is very well written and expressed.. how true this is for some people.. I in my past could relate to this.. so sad though when people don't realize what they lost or feel it.. very expressive poem .. lovely job

rock on,

vampyress Jenni

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