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Array ( [sid] => 136024 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => help me [time] => 2007-07-17 08:42:53 [hometext] => the last poem i wrote before my suicide attempt [bodytext] => the truth is screaming to be spoken
beneath my many lies
but I'm good at pretending
that everything’s alright

I’d Like for someone to know
that their friend is dieing here
and I’d like for them to help me
fight away my many fears

but you have to understand
how difficult it is to be
the broken girl I'm hiding-
the real me

If you would show me
that our friendship is true
if maybe you could assure me
that I really can trust you

If you didn’t laugh at my silent tears
or my tortured poetry
if my pain’s not too much for you
I might be able to show you me

but fear of exposure
of the person even I hate
is binding me to my secrets
until I feel as if it is too late

So although the truth is screaming to be spoken
beneath my many lies
i try and pretend
like everything’s alright

and although I'd like for someone to know
that I am dieing here
and I'd like for them to help me
fight away my many fears

I even more so want to look strong
so people don't see a weak, frightened girl when they look at me
and I have too much pride
to let anyone help me

my independent nature
seems more a burden now
because even though I no I need to ask for help
I really don’t know how

SO I'm hoping someone will see it
the way I bleed from within
and help me be more confident
so I don’t have to keep myself hidden

And although my lips refuse to ask
my eyes are screaming for your help
and hoping you can keep loving me
until I love myself.
[comments] => 4 [counter] => 172 [topic] => 14 [informant] => tearstained_soul [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 9 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DreamsandWishes )

help me

Contributed by tearstained_soul on Tuesday, 17th July 2007 @ 08:42:53 AM in AEST
Topic: DreamsandWishes

the truth is screaming to be spoken
beneath my many lies
but I'm good at pretending
that everything’s alright

I’d Like for someone to know
that their friend is dieing here
and I’d like for them to help me
fight away my many fears

but you have to understand
how difficult it is to be
the broken girl I'm hiding-
the real me

If you would show me
that our friendship is true
if maybe you could assure me
that I really can trust you

If you didn’t laugh at my silent tears
or my tortured poetry
if my pain’s not too much for you
I might be able to show you me

but fear of exposure
of the person even I hate
is binding me to my secrets
until I feel as if it is too late

So although the truth is screaming to be spoken
beneath my many lies
i try and pretend
like everything’s alright

and although I'd like for someone to know
that I am dieing here
and I'd like for them to help me
fight away my many fears

I even more so want to look strong
so people don't see a weak, frightened girl when they look at me
and I have too much pride
to let anyone help me

my independent nature
seems more a burden now
because even though I no I need to ask for help
I really don’t know how

SO I'm hoping someone will see it
the way I bleed from within
and help me be more confident
so I don’t have to keep myself hidden

And although my lips refuse to ask
my eyes are screaming for your help
and hoping you can keep loving me
until I love myself.

Copyright Â© tearstained_soul ... [ 2007-07-17 08:42:53]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: help me (User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on Tuesday, 17th July 2007 @ 01:26:47 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I really liked your poem. I can definately understand the depth of your emotions having been down that dark road before. May your poetry give you the strength to keep on going...writing has saved my life many times. I wish for you peace and happiness.
Carol

Re: help me (User Rating: 1 )
by physcoquack on Tuesday, 17th July 2007 @ 04:06:19 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

to have walked such a narrow road is to have gained many things you will forever be stronger then you where even when it may not seem so. i have pondered if things would be better with out me but how would we know if we where not there to find out

Re: help me (User Rating: 1 )
by yackerz85 on Wednesday, 18th July 2007 @ 12:04:20 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I can imagine the difficulty you faced in writing this. I can almost feel your tears as you wrote each line. Its so sad but so beautiful to release the thoughts considered so taboo that it was hard to reveal them to anybody. It's okay, bringing your darkness to light shows that you now are stronger. Let your friends know how you feel and they will save your life.

Re: help me (User Rating: 1 )
by PhantomVampyress on Wednesday, 18th July 2007 @ 03:59:06 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

this is soo very sad. I can feel the pain and torture through this.. you should not take your life.. if you take your life that is letting whatever is attacking you or making you feel that way win.. you have to rise above.. many people care about you. you just have to learn to like yourself. everyone is here for a reason and a purpose and remember God loves you.

Very well penned out

Rock on,

vampyress Jenni

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