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Array ( [sid] => 135599 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => They've let it go. [time] => 2007-06-27 10:24:09 [hometext] => I'm scared and heart-broken... [bodytext] => I felt my heart break,
As you said you’re letting it go.
Tears started streaming down my cheeks.
Now i can’t feel my heart beat.

You said it’s clear that i’m not lying,
Yet you’ve let the court process stop.
I feel like i’ve been punched, stabbed and kicked.
And i feel physically sick.

Now I’m restless inside the flash backs,
As i’m remembering all those things he did.
I want to find him and spit in his face.
I need some where to hide and escape.

I’m scared!

Scared of him coming after me.
I’m trapped in night mares and insecurities.

... Suddenly i feel suicidal.
More than words express.
It’s been months since i’ve felt this suicidal.
Months since i felt this helpless...

... I won’t kill myself.
But the unanswered questions are filling me up.
And i want them to shut up!

But what will be done to stop him re-offending?
What exactly did he say in his statement?
Can i have my clothes and under wear back to burn them???
What exactly did Sharon say in her statement?
What did his friends say in their statements?
What if he comes after me?
What if he comes after Dot?
Is he even allowed contact now?
...
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 309 [topic] => 65 [informant] => deathdrop [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => toughstuff )

They've let it go.

Contributed by deathdrop on Wednesday, 27th June 2007 @ 10:24:09 AM in AEST
Topic: toughstuff

I felt my heart break,
As you said you’re letting it go.
Tears started streaming down my cheeks.
Now i can’t feel my heart beat.

You said it’s clear that i’m not lying,
Yet you’ve let the court process stop.
I feel like i’ve been punched, stabbed and kicked.
And i feel physically sick.

Now I’m restless inside the flash backs,
As i’m remembering all those things he did.
I want to find him and spit in his face.
I need some where to hide and escape.

I’m scared!

Scared of him coming after me.
I’m trapped in night mares and insecurities.

... Suddenly i feel suicidal.
More than words express.
It’s been months since i’ve felt this suicidal.
Months since i felt this helpless...

... I won’t kill myself.
But the unanswered questions are filling me up.
And i want them to shut up!

But what will be done to stop him re-offending?
What exactly did he say in his statement?
Can i have my clothes and under wear back to burn them???
What exactly did Sharon say in her statement?
What did his friends say in their statements?
What if he comes after me?
What if he comes after Dot?
Is he even allowed contact now?
...

Copyright Â© deathdrop ... [ 2007-06-27 10:24:09]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: They've let it go. (User Rating: 1 )
by Poess on Wednesday, 27th June 2007 @ 02:41:20 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I like this. Obviously this is a tough subject to write about...and it's clear the emotions took over the end.

I'm so sorry. I think it's incredibly strong of you to have pressed charges in the first place. Everyone says they would but until they're in the situation they never know what it's like...I wasn't as strong...only the closest people to me even know it ever happend. . .
Keep writing, it helps.
I think I'll post my poem about my experience tomorrow...because of reading this.

Everything will work out okay. Find out about a restraining order and do whatever you have to make yourself comfortable...it isn't fair to be a victim 3 times ( the occurance, the pressing charges, and the case being dropped)
My heart is with you.
~Hollie

Re: They've let it go. (User Rating: 1 )
by Dom on Friday, 29th June 2007 @ 04:43:44 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is painfully emotional and difficult to read, you are extremely brave to have got through this and done something about it.

Thank you also for the comment on my poem, I would have sent a PM but mine aren't working at the moment.

Take care,
Dom

Re: They've let it go. (User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on Saturday, 8th December 2007 @ 02:07:45 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this... I'm sorry, my heart sinks for you. Your soul was so beautifully poured out, but I'm sorry it had to be about something like this. I don't know you at all, I don't think, this may be the first time I've commented on your work, but I know this: you did what you could. Thank you for that. I find strength from others being strong, sometimes.
Do take care,
David

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