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Array
(
[sid] => 135363
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => loosing control
[time] => 2007-06-19 10:15:09
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => Loosing Control! The fire pours from my heart-a fire of elements bursting in the air, elements of emotional breakdown-not ready to use my fists in despair What good will it do, by putting fear inside my peers, Did I do enough damage as they weep with tears over the years? They tell me to control my temper-but do I learn, all I do is erupt-my adrenaline starts to burn Ferocious tenacity building up in my blood through my brain, will I live the rest of my days in vain Who do I love, and will it last, will it deteriorate in seconds like times in the past, Instability keeps building around my membrane; it storms very lightly, like pellets of rain, Astounding results are too far to see-I must be blind, so I will replay my life in rewind So I can find some traces of nourishment that rejuvenated my core, the core of my existence that has come no more The wasted years of pursuing fantasies are done; the days are getting faster, I’m always on the run I feel intrepid, my rage is getting to an extreme, will I abuse it in ignorance, or keep it in my dream A dream of a world where I can sore above the mountains, with an island around me, with incredible fountains Fountains of joy, and splendor imbibed in the air, with no harmful odors to breathe, I start to tear Tear my fears into broken pieces of feathers, to fall beneath me, as I begin to sever Sever my anguish from what boils inside, it can’t contain anymore-nor will it reside, How many chances did God give me with friends, yet despite all His gifts, my attitude I wouldn’t amend. Hesitation is the beginning of a setback that glides with charge, while my pride is in a struggle, ready to barge Barging to elude the thunder covering my trails, of a viable goal that has really derailed Continuing my tracks, not looking back for errors, as the thunder escalates louder, I’m in a state of terror What have I become, do I realize my own faults, being inclined to always assault, Blatantly swerving to a place of crooked suggestions, which leads me to a state of major regression It hits me-knocks me real hard to the ground, as I struggle to stand not hearing a sound Silenced too long, I can’t contain my composure any longer, I’ll stay confined in my reflection, ain’t gaining much stronger, Loosing control-and hyper mental from what I’ve been handed, the time has come when I remain stranded! [comments] => 3 [counter] => 226 [topic] => 64 [informant] => jawdeh [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => ambiguous )
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