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Array ( [sid] => 134835 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Lost Again [time] => 2007-05-31 11:30:07 [hometext] => [bodytext] => poor little girl
living in this corrupted world
she lie broken on the floor
she doesnt wanna live anymore
she lost everything
what more could this cold world bring?
shes lost her best friend,hero,brother,confidant
she has nothing left to want
she uses the alcohol and the powder to kill the pain
no longer wanting to live in vain
he used her then he left her
it happened so fast it was a blur
crying everynight
she doesnt understand why
she used to tell him everything
hes the only person to have heard her sing
tears roll down her cheeks
as she realizes that he hasnt called in weeks
she misses his hugs and smiles
though she hasnt felt or seen them in a while
she used to run to him when she was hurt
now shes so lost
once again she falls to the ground
so numb with pain she doesnt realize shes fallen down
no one to talk to,nothing to say
she wakes up to another meaningless day
everuthing she sees and does is a reminder
everyone thinks shes an over reacter
but today her world has cracked
shes hit rock bottom once again
and no one can see that her smile is fake
well thats their mistake [comments] => 2 [counter] => 254 [topic] => 48 [informant] => liindso14 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )

Lost Again

Contributed by liindso14 on Thursday, 31st May 2007 @ 11:30:07 AM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

poor little girl
living in this corrupted world
she lie broken on the floor
she doesnt wanna live anymore
she lost everything
what more could this cold world bring?
shes lost her best friend,hero,brother,confidant
she has nothing left to want
she uses the alcohol and the powder to kill the pain
no longer wanting to live in vain
he used her then he left her
it happened so fast it was a blur
crying everynight
she doesnt understand why
she used to tell him everything
hes the only person to have heard her sing
tears roll down her cheeks
as she realizes that he hasnt called in weeks
she misses his hugs and smiles
though she hasnt felt or seen them in a while
she used to run to him when she was hurt
now shes so lost
once again she falls to the ground
so numb with pain she doesnt realize shes fallen down
no one to talk to,nothing to say
she wakes up to another meaningless day
everuthing she sees and does is a reminder
everyone thinks shes an over reacter
but today her world has cracked
shes hit rock bottom once again
and no one can see that her smile is fake
well thats their mistake

Copyright © liindso14 ... [ 2007-05-31 11:30:07]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Lost Again (User Rating: 1 )
by 5MinutePoet on Thursday, 31st May 2007 @ 11:56:13 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

not bad, though i would suggest you look at the endong, may change it to a two liner, it lust doesn't have the impact to end there for me. Also the ryhming couplets, effective as they are, are placed slighty out of sync when you decide to throw a random word into the mix

Re: Lost Again (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Saturday, 30th June 2007 @ 04:32:55 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

A poem that rips at the heart. I hope you find peace and happiness and that the world doesn't seem so dark

Michelle

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