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Array
(
[sid] => 13304
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Succumbing to my Misery
[time] => 2003-02-25 19:20:00
[hometext] => ...
[bodytext] => I can't describe this pain I hide inside
It drowns me, suffocates me I blink the tears back Keep my emotions in check, But inwardly I die Its like my organs are fried From that one little glance Seeing that one action Saw my hope that took so long to build Come crashing down before my eyes I'm sorry I'm not good enough That all we'll ever have Is our meaningless talks The little smiles the pointless hugs I could cry, but what's the point? Will it change anything? No, everything will be the same The same sh***y mess as before These tears cannot save me I still have some small ray of hope That maybe next time I'll hit a vein Instead of just leaving myself Scared, scarred, broken, and bloody What a morbid, but happy thought All because of that one action My patchwork heart was yet again Rent apart, stomped in the dirt I feel like some skin is being peeled off Layer by layer leaving my nerves shot My attention stagnant Ripped off slowly to draw out the agony Waiting for the last layer so i can die, But the last layer never comes I just lie pain coursing through my body Through my mutterings and murmurings My prayers, my wishes, my failures, My want for death, my rejection, My unshed tears, my want for love I find this pain with its roots Spreading throughout my body Slowly choking off my air My fingers claw at the air Misery raises her fist Victory is hers and she drags me under The rejection rapes my will, My will to smile, to live, to breathe Maybe next week I'll be gone I'll no longer have to fight In this pointless battle Its to ***** hard Or maybe I'm to weak DON'T mourn me Smile because I'm FINALLY happy [comments] => 3 [counter] => 166 [topic] => 22 [informant] => bobotheclown [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )
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