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| Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 29-May 17:17:33 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 131895
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I'm Sorry
[time] => 2007-02-19 14:08:09
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => I'm not the kind of person That can easily say how I feel I like to keep things to myself I don't like things to be made a big deal. So I'm writing you this poem Because I'll never be able to say The words to tell you what I'm thinking Or what I'm feeling from day to day. We've known each other too long To be doing this kind of thing But it will almost always definitely happen Especially as much as we drink. I can't imagine you not being my friend And maybe I thought that there could be more But I'm not willing to risk that again I almost lost you yesterday, of that I am sure. I apologize for how I acted towards you Albeit lame, it's my only excuse But I can act like a whole different person Because of my excessive alcohol use. I will never, ever be mad at you I was just embarrassed, is all And the beer that I drank seemed to double my shame This morning when I remembered, I was appalled. I really do have a big problem That jokingly I'll readily admit But I know that it's true, and when I'm by myself I get scared, but I just can't quit. I told you that I don't want to live by myself Because of stupid things, like fixing a drawer Although I don't know what it is There is something that is so much more. In the rare event that I'm actually sober And lay down in bed at night I toss, and I turn, and my heart pounds I don't sleep well because of my fright. I have no idea why I'm like that Or what it is that scares me so badly But alcohol is the only thing that takes it away It's the only way I can sleep, sadly. Sometimes I just don't feel right If I don't get something to drink And I can't ever stop at one or two But "I can" is what I always think. On my list of priorities Drinking is number one I have no food in my refrigerator And my laundry is rarely done. I didn't get to the bank on Friday Because I went straight to the bar I had double vision driving home that night And I could have killed my friend in the car. I didn't get there Saturday morning either Because I slept in too late Yet I go out and spend money that I don't have O, myself I truly do hate. Now I sit here at work trying to type this But my hands are still shaking from last night Or maybe it's the 12 cups of coffee I drink everyday Hey, at least I made it to work, right? And I think that I'm fat, but would I cut out the beer? Of course not, I'd rather not eat. So for lunch I brought with me a lettuce sandwich Now there's a meal that can't be beat. My stomach hurts me everyday Because of how hungry I am But if I eat I feel like I'll fail I feel like I'm stuck in such a jam. Now I'm invited to dinner tomorrow evening And of course I had to say yes Because it's with my co-worker, my boss, and my boss's boss Now I will have to eat, and hide the hickey that's on my chest. I have two little nieces And I'm the only aunt that they have But Auntie's never around to play She's always at the bar...how sad. So by now I'm sure you've realized Just what a mess I am I never meant to hurt you Please forgive me if you can. This is why I shouldn't date And probably won't anytime soon At least until I've fixed myself Who am I kidding...I know I'm doomed. I hope that I can change things I really am such a fool Until then, you're the only one who knows So please - Don't tell a soul... [comments] => 2 [counter] => 386 [topic] => 50 [informant] => annoiosa [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 9 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => ApologyPoetry )
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