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Best Diet Ever

Contributed by Julie on Sunday, 16th February 2003 @ 09:20:00 AM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry



I am not writing this poem
The way people normally would
This will not be filled with sappy romance
Or the phrase "I love you"
It will not contain roses and kisses and eternal love
I will try not to write this crude or crass or emotionless


Excuse me please
When I can not find the words
To express the exhaustion
Of reading poem after poem about love
Because, well
Honestly
It makes me nauseated
It is as if love is being rubbed in my face
Do people write poems about their 400,000 dollar car
Or how they shop in New York for the winter
And Jamaica in the summer
Do I write about all the luxuries life has granted upon me?
No, because there are not many
Now
I admire you all for having the talent to write about such a great emotion
But for all the losers, like myself, sake
Please remove your "luxuries of life" out of my ***** face!
Because I would at least like to savor my dinner

Now I know what you are all thinking
"She's just bitter"
And you are exactly correct
I am bitter
I am bitter in the way
That frustrates
Irritates
Annoys
Repulses
And did I forget to mention
Nauseates
In a way that
The enamel
Is eroding off my teeth
To the point
That my co workers
Are accusing me
Of being bulimic
But I guess love poetry can exist
Because the more I read it
The more weight I loose
So thank god
For sappy romantic poetry
Because it is the best ***** diet I have ever been on.




Copyright © Julie ... [ 2003-02-16 09:20:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Best Diet Ever (User Rating: 1 )
by Maha on Sunday, 16th February 2003 @ 10:07:12 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
well...sometimes I get the same feeling you have about love poems and I wonder, if love poems are everywhere, then why don't we see happy people everywhere? Maybe because true love is only a feeling we want to live, and it does not necessary exist! For me I think the best poems are the ones that come out of true misery or love loss. Thanks, I really enjoyed reading your poem. God bless you!


Re: Best Diet Ever (User Rating: 1 )
by Aidan on Sunday, 16th February 2003 @ 03:18:26 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
I understand

But I still write the sappy stuff. It gives me hope ;p




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