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A Sinful Savior

Contributed by Rum on Friday, 13th October 2006 @ 06:28:00 PM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry



Ma Ma's crying
Daddy's dying
I'm sitting here all alone

When darkness veils
There are no tales
No on understands me there

I'm all alone
Nothing shone
Though Ma Ma knows I'm here

In denial
It's truly vile
That she denies a fatherless form

With no tears
I disappear
Though I was never really there

In the sky
She would cry
When questioned of a son

And oh what a time
To be singing rhymes
Of things you were never meant to hear

But when Daddie's here
And ma ma's not near
I don't have to be afraid

Now she's stealing glances
Of romances
She has truly lost it all

'Cause when she comes home
She's all alone
We never will forget

She stole my life
And deprived me
Of a living chance




Copyright © Rum ... [ 2006-10-13 18:28:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: A Sinful Savior (User Rating: 1 )
by alecfernadez on Friday, 13th October 2006 @ 06:55:08 PM AEST
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Form wise your poem was okay. However I disagree with your opinions, not saying there wrong and my way of thinkings right, just saying I disagree.
From your point of view, or at least from what I can gather from this poem, a woman who is raped has to keep the baby? Because abortion is wrong, the child is brought up in a loveless environment. It would be a child borne of rape, and personally I'd rather be dead then the product of rape. I personally feel something is only truly alive if it is aware, not self aware, but aware. A single celled organism is not aware, its no different than the skin cells in your mouth. I believe that woman have the right to do what they want with there own bodies. What your talking about is;
"what could have been"
I couldn't really get into the emotion behind the story, because it was told from the perspective of a pseaudo living organism, a single celled pocket of possibility. I just couldn't buy it. Anyway thnx for the contreversy, and this was pretty good, albiet a lil preachy and confused (its illegal to abort a child after it is deemed to be self aware, usually they are aborted (in clinics) at a cell, or cluster of cells stage. I dont agree with illegal abortions because A)Your actually killing something that is aware
B)It's dangerous to the mother )
but yeah its pretty good.


Re: A Sinful Savior (User Rating: 1 )
by Lady_Daisy on Friday, 13th October 2006 @ 07:43:39 PM AEST
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Nice poem, but I have to agree with the person above. A person should be brought up knowing they were conseived in love.... I would also have to qualms aborting a baby if it were deformed.... because I know how cruel the world can be.


Re: A Sinful Savior (User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on Saturday, 14th October 2006 @ 02:51:14 AM AEST
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I don't think anyone has a right to say ok i want wanna have this baby so i am going to abort it.Theres alot of couples out there wanting to adopt .no matter what i am aginst abortions. sorry thats my opinion


Re: A Sinful Savior (User Rating: 1 )
by Leoricx on Saturday, 14th October 2006 @ 06:15:39 AM AEST
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A controversial subject which I see has already started some debate. You are more than entitled to your opinion and feelings and I think you've put them well in the poem above. For the record, I'm pro-choice. There are many factors, some of which have been brought up, which I think need to be considered before having a child.

Once again though, well written.




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